I'm Looking Through You
by kidofthefrozenfrontrange
Summary: After the battle, Harry is given something to help him finally get some answers about his parents. Those answers may just help him and his friends move on and look forward. Marauder and HP eras. AU-ish with mostly cannon pairings. Complete...maybe.
1. Chapter 1

**Starting a muti-chapter fic...right before finals. Genius.**

**Clearly I'm not very smart, so the possibility of me owning Harry Potter is fairly slim, eh?**

**UPDATE 4-19-09: I uploaded the wrong one, this is revised slightly. **

* * *

Walking away from the mourners, Harry wistfully thought of his invisibility cloak, and the foolish decision he had made not to bring it along with him. Granted, it would have been fairly strange to the crowd to hear a speech coming from apparent nothingness, but it would have been at least comforting to hold the fabric in his hand and know that he could slip away without notice once the funeral became too much. People coming up to him to congratulate him on his so called victory over the Dark Lord was hard to handle on a normal day, but at a funeral seemed cruelly unwarranted.

Instead, he moved slowly away from the crowds, toward someplace he could think to himself. As he did he loosened his neck tie and rubbed his neck, trying to sooth the tension that was building there. These funerals for the fallen had been bad enough, particularly those close to him like Fred- whose funeral was, up to this point, the hardest to endure. He remembered standing beside a catatonic Ron as he deftly comforted Hermione, trying to do the same think for an equally distressed Ginny and feeling as if nothing would be right ever again. This one, however, was the worst. This one was Remus Lupin's funeral.

The man had not only been a mentor of Harry's- the man who had taught him invaluably- but he was the final one. The last Marauder remaining. With Remus Lupin fell Harry's only living link to his parents. Saying goodbye to a man he loved so was difficult, but saying goodbye to that link? Damn near impossible.

He positioned himself beneath a tree, away from prying eyes and felt the sting of tears. For a flickering moment he succumbed to them, allowing them to fall quickly and quietly as he balled his fists in an equal force of rage that came with this loss. He felt his knuckles scrape against the bark of the tree as he leaned upon it, forcing the tears back down inside him.

His isolation did not last long, however, as the somewhat clumsy footsteps of Ron Weasley approached him. When Ron reached him, the two stood in silence for a moment, neither sure what to say when so much grief and loss was filling the air between them. Ron's hands shoved deep into his pockets, eyes averting Harry's. He knew Ron was merely trying to think of something to say to comfort his best friend. Harry knew the feeling well, he was unable to think of anything either just a few days prior when it was Ron who was forced to bury his brother.

"They're about to read his will, Harry. He's left something for you." Ron managed. He nodded his head and followed his friend back into the crowd, a few paces behind.

After the reading, in which his few possessions were predictably given to his wife and, with her passing, they're son, Harry once again found a chance to be alone. In his hands he turned over a note Lupin had written for him, which was accompanied by a box not to be opened until after the letter was read.

In the precise handwriting of Remus Lupin Harry's name lay atop the envelope. He was having trouble opening it. Something about it screamed finality. That his friend was truly gone. Looking up he knew Ron stood right outside the door, both insuring no one disturbs Harry yet simultaneously informing Harry he was not alone, not really. With a sigh, he tore open the note carefully and read:

_Harry,_

_Years ago you came to me with concerns regarding your father and whether he was truly a good man. I know deep down you know this to be true, if not from what you have heard from myself and Sirius the by what you know in your heart. However this doubt led me to realize something very important about you, Harry. About something you are missing._

_Children should have their parents around them as they grow up. They should be able to learn of their family from their own mouths and should be able to admire them from personal incidents. You should have been able to witness firsthand the good in your father. It is with great sorrow that I know you never had that chance and never will. _

_Knowing this, there all I could think to do was make a feeble attempt to rectify this situation as best I can. With the help of many others who contributed, I have done all I could think to do. I know this is by no means a good enough substitute to that experience, but I hope enclosed you will find some answers._

_Remus_

Harry felt his heart ache at reading his friend's name on the slip of paper. His words, formed a knot in Harry's stomach. He turned to the box beside him, still perplexed as to what it held within. Carefully he grasped the top and opened the heavy cardboard. Eyes wide, he lifted the contents out of the box and sat it in front of him. Just a fingers length away was something most unexpected.

He watched the familiar silver liquids of a myriad of memories swirl before him from within a pensieve.

* * *

**Before I continue I should let you know that I am BY NO MEANS and expert on the whole timeline thing. I know the general order of things regarding the Marauders era i.e when they discovered Remus was a werewolf, the Shrieking Shack incident, the fifth year incident, Sirius moving in with James, and etc,... HOWEVER- if there is anything absolutely dire that has to be in the timeline OR you know of a website with a good, detailed timeline, please let me know. I want to follow cannon pretty closely. Alas, there were more than six people attending Hogwarts during that time, so I have to do OC's, but I promise they will be kept to a minimum as I abhor them.**

**Despite my finals coming up I'm pretty sure I will be able to update at least once a week since I've written a few things ahead of time. It's not a promise, but not a flat out lie, either.**

**If you know of a good website or just important things to include please just let me know and maybe review too? **


	2. Chapter 2

**Next part, I think Fridays may be my update day for the story by the way. Every Friday something new should be up. **

**Thanks to PumbleXchook for the review.**

**I own nothing.**

* * *

For a while, Harry did nothing. Staring at the pensieve filled with the last vestiges of his parent's lives he dared not move, for fear this was not what he thought it was. Part of him wanted to leap into the memories. Submerge himself completely until he knew everything, every last piece he could. Another part hesitated. Was he really going to see his father as a good man? Was his mother truly as wonderful as she seemed? Did she belong with, Merlin help him, Snape?

"Ron," He croaked, hardly above normal speaking volume. It was, however, enough for the lanky red-head to hear, and immediately enter Harry's private area in the Lupin's modest home.

"Yeah, mate?" He asked as he entered.

"Where's Hermione?" Harry asked. Ron hesitated for a moment, as he did most days at the mention of their friend.

"Um, I think she's talking with Mrs. Tonks right now. Tending to Teddy, probably."

"Can you get her. I need her-" He stopped and added quickly, "The both of you. Tell her it's about Remus' will." Ron nodded and left dutifully, seemingly unaware of Harry's initial exclusion of him.

There was an unknown tension Harry began to feel recently around Ron. It was a strange feeling. He could feel himself going through the regular motions with his best friend. They would talk to each other normally enough, but there would be an air of formality to their meetings. Time spent together was limited, but it was to be expected with every person frantically being pushed in many directions- Hogwarts was in shambles, funerals every other day, there wasn't exactly time for a game of chess. Still, he was finding it difficult to be around him alone.

"Harry," Hermione greeted with a sympathetic hug upon arrival, Ron standing just behind her.

"How's you parents?" He asked, realizing it had been a while since he saw her. She had retrieved her parents just after Fred's funeral, returning just in time for Remus'.

"As well as could be expected considering," She said with a shrug, "Now that they're relieved about the war and all they seem more cross about me spending a year alone in a tent with a couple of boys." She said with a modest chuckle. Harry smirked as he noticed Ron's ears turn slightly pink.

"Right, well, you said something about Remus' will?" Ron asked.

"Yeah," Harry replied, snapping back to the situation at hand. He handed them the note. As they read they're heads approached closer and closer. With a grimace Harry realized if they were to turn their heads toward each other he would be witness to yet another of their inappropriately timed kisses. Instead, they both seemed to realize the proximity issue and practically lept apart, as if fearing the other. This time Harry inwardly groaned, wondering if it would be worse to witness the two dance around each other even longer or spend his time as a third wheel in their love affair.

Of course, he was one to talk. He hadn't exactly been rushing to get back together with Ginny either. There was grieving to be done, of course, but there was also the general awkwardness that followed the two around. He had, after all, broken up with her. There were so many things contributing to there lack of communication, he found it completely unnecessary to add his lack of courage to the list of reasons. How bad would it look if he could defeat Voldemort but not ask out a girl?

"So what exactly did he leave you, then?" Ron asked after they both finished and their complexions returned to a normal color less red in tone. Wordless Harry motioned to the pensieve as Hermione let out a small gasp.

"Harry, this is amazing!" She exclaimed.

"Is it?" He asked.

"What do you mean?" She asked, "You've always wanted to know more about your parents. This seems like a perfect opportunity."

"I know, it's just that- everything I told you guys about Snape and my mother. I wonder if these memories will really do what Remus wanted them to do or just prove what I'm beginning to suspect was true- that maybe my parents weren't really meant to be." Harry explained.

"I suppose you have a point," Hermione said, empathetically, "The disappointment that would be crippling. On the other hand do you want to spend your life never knowing? Knowing may mean pain but not knowing would mean never having peace of mind. Then there's-" She babbled, getting herself wrapped up in the logic.

"Mate, there's only one way to know for sure." Ron cut in simply.

It couldn't possibly be that simple, but for some reason the argument seemed unbeatable. Even Hermione shrugged as if to say _he has a point._ Chalk one up to teaspoon ranged emotions. Besides, Remus was right. Deep down he knew there had to be something redeeming about James Potter. If not, then how did his parents even get together? How would Remus have been friends with him?

"I think I have to do this." Harry said after a moment, with resolve.

"You want us to go with you?" Ron asked. Harry considered this for a moment. The emotional support would be helpful, but this seemed like a private endeavor. It was something he wanted to do on his own.

"Thanks, but it may be best to do this on my own. Find out about them by myself." Harry decided. His friends nodded in understanding.

"Harry, I think it may be prudent to remind you, these aren't your parent's memories. This is put together by people _around_ your parents." Hermione interjected.

"So?"

"So I don't want you to be upset if it doesn't give you all you're hoping for."

"I'm settling for anything, Hermione. As it is I have nothing." Harry reminded her.

"So how are you planning to go about this, then?" Ron asked.

"I suppose I'll start at the beginning."

* * *

**I promise next chapter goes into the memories, I'm just setting up Harry's issues post-battle as the story will alternate between the two timelines.**

**Also, I'm still looking for a reliable website with an accurate timeline for the Marauders. **

**Let me know how I'm doing and review. Thanks for reading.**


	3. Chapter 3

**I'm going to post a little early since I have a ridiculous load of exams next week to study for and I don't want to forget. Enjoy.**

* * *

Harry couldn't take it anymore. He was sitting with Ron and Hermione after a long day of meetings with the Ministry of Magic and helping with the restoration of Hogwarts when he finally snapped. Hours on end of Ron and Hermione alternating between conversing awkwardly and bickering and he could no longer just sit there and take it. No human could be expected to suffer that much. With little more than a prolonged groan of frustration he lifted himself from the couch at Grimauld place and made his way for the hiding place he made for the pensieve.

He had originally planned on pacing himself with the memories. Store them away safely until he was fully in the mindset of learning the truth, prepared to devote his full time to learning about his parents. For a moment he paused, contemplating if he was being impetuous doing this only because his friends were being annoying. Then he heard them below, beginning to argue about which one of them caused Harry to rush out of the room. He dove right in.

Harry landed in the Great Hall of Hogwarts, students murmuring in anticipation. It was the sorting of the first years, Harry realized. He had been there before, but he still watched with interest as Sirius Black, someone known for being far from nervous and shy, make his way towards the hat with solemn fear in his eyes. He noticed the boy look back to the other eleven year olds and watched as his father gave Sirius and encouraging smile as the sorting hat was placed upon his head.

The hat deliberated for only a brief moment before the thunderous cry of the Gryffindor table greeted Sirius. Harry watched with bemusement as Sirius almost immediately reverted into the man he knew. A cocky smile, a relaxed nature immediately took over the boy.

Next Harry witnessed his mother once again get sorted into Gryffindor in a fraction of a second, as if there was no doubt about it. Remus was after her. Like Sirius the boy did not look pleased at all to be there, though Harry knew it was for entirely different reasons. After taking the vacant seat Lily had left beside Sirius after she rebuffed him, Lupin still hardly seemed excited, a fact Sirius tried to change.

"Come on, mate, why the long face? You're in Gryffindor!" Sirius asked. Remus did not answer.

Not long after James Potter made his way to the hat, the exact opposite expression on his features than either of his friends or Lily. There was no apprehension, he sat with confidence as the hat shouted Gryffindor, like he knew all along it was where he was meant to be.

Unfortunately for Lily, she had not seated herself quite far enough away from the obnoxious boys to be drawn away from their conversations. She had sat herself on the opposite side of Sirius to make a point. Letting him know she did not approve of Severus, however that seat was beside the only free seat James could take close enough to his new friends.

"Oi, see mate? I knew you were alright," James proclaimed to Sirius, "To good to be sorted into lousy Slytherin."

At that precise moment the sorting hat had just been removed from Snape's head as he moved to join the Slytherin table. James tilted his head towards Snape, as if informing him how lucky he was to be there instead of with Snape. The two fell into laughter as Lily tutted in disapproval in a fashion eerily similar to Hermione, in Harry's opinion. The two boys turned their attention to her.

"Oh, that's right, she and _Snivellus_wanted to be in Slytherin together." Sirius mocked.

"That's _not_ his name!" Lily defended.

"Why would anyone want to be in Slytherin?" Peter Pettigrew asked, much to Harry's disdain. His sorting had lasted the longest, the hat seemed undecided where to place the boy and for the first time Harry doubted whether the old hat really knew what it was doing.

"See? This guy's got it right." James said, slapping an arm around Peter's shoulder, much to the other boy's delight.

"What's so bad about being a Slytherin?" Lily asked, "What's so different between them and us?"

"They're evil." Peter replied.

"Sev isn't. If it wasn't for him-"

"Not all of them," Remus spoke up above James and Sirius before they could mock her nickname for Snape, "But historically the most dark wizards and witches come from that house."

"That shouldn't matter. You don't even know him, but just because he's in a different house you hate him?" She argued.

"Actually, if you recall, we hated him before we knew what house he was in." James pointed out. Sirius and Peter giggled beside him.

"You're pathetic." Lily retorted before returning to her dinner.

As the memory began to disappear Harry could not help but see that nothing had really changed. His entire time at Hogwarts there had been animosity between the Gryffindor and Slytherin, just as there had been years before. Moments later Harry was within the boy's dormitory. He sat himself between Sirius and Remus. The four boys sat talking with each other, as if they had always known each other.

"So Sirius, what do you reckon your parents will do when they find out your a Gryffindor?" James asked playfully.

"Oh, I don't know. Probably send a howler at least. I'm in for it for sure." Sirius said, though his word were spoken through a wide grin.

"How about you guys?" James directed to Remus and Peter, "You where you expected to be?"

"I didn't know where I was going to end up," Peter replied, "Hufflepuff was my bet."

"Give it time," Sirius joked, "Maybe they'll realize the mistake and send you to the right place. How about you, Remus?"

"I'm just...thankful to be here at all." The boy answered quietly.

"Here, here," James seconded, thought he looked thoughtfully at Remus, who seemed thankful that the outcry interrupted Sirius, who still had questions for Remus.

As a new memory formed Harry found he had not moved far at all, but back to the Great Hall. A few meters away Lily stood, looking across the hall for someone. Turning with her Harry saw her wave excitedly at Snape, who reluctantly returned the wave before resuming conversation with a few fellow Slytherin. Undeterred, she made her way to his table.

"Oi, Evans, I think you may be heading the wrong way!" He heard Sirius holler towards her. She did not stop.

"Sev, hey!" She exclaimed happily as she took the vacant seat beside him.

There was a tension in the air as she obliviously sat at the Slytherin table as if nothing were out of the ordinary. One of the Slytherins, whom Harry could not recognize, but was certain had a future with a Death Eater mask, began to speak up, but Snape gave him a stare reminiscent of Harry's time in detention with him and he fell silent.

"Lily, what are you doing here?" He asked gently.

"Having lunch, obviously. Why, what's the matter?"

"Nothing it's just that...maybe you should sit with your friends at lunch." Snape suggested.

"...I am. I'm sitting with you." Lily said, not comprehending.

"I meant... you-your other fr-friends." He said nervously.

"What, you mean Potter and his little cronies?" Lily said, realizing what he meant and now indignant.

"Merlin, no! I just meant-" He sighed, "This area is usually for Slytherins, Lily. Not Gryffindors."

Snape attempted to give her a remorseful look as his other friends seemed to look at him with mixed reactions. Part of them happy he was ridding them of the unwelcome company, part of them probably upset he did not do more harshly. Lily returned his gaze with a brief moment of hurt, then a steely glare almost equal to one she would had given James before rising and making her way to the area of Gryffindors.

"Lily, you can sit with us." Remus offered. She gave him a small smile, but sat herself with a few other girls a few seats away.

"Git," James mumbled under his breath, glaring at Snape.

"Come off it, mate, you don't like her that much. Besides, you wouldn't let a Slytherin sit next to us." Sirius joked.

"Evans isn't the point," James retorted, "It's him. He's a git. Probably just ashamed to sit next to someone who isn't a pureblood."

"If you remember, he's not so keen on you, James. He probably doesn't want to sit next to you either." Remus reasoned.

"You know what I mean." James angrily spat. A moment elapsed before a sly grin crossed his features.

"Got something in mind?" Sirius said, reading his mind.

Concentrating hard, James brought out his wand and made a few motions. Still obviously new at spellcasting, he still managed to be impressive for his age as he aimed the spell at the feet of Snape. After he finished, nothing happened.

"What was that?" Remus asked.

"Did it work?" Sirius also asked, intrigued.

"Don't know yet," James said, a satisfied smile on his face as he finished up his meal.

Moments later even Harry could not help but chuckle a bit as Snape and two of his other Slytherins tripped over each other as they rose, their shoes connecting one to the other. The riotous laughter of Sirius and James could be heard over the rest, though many others found the prank amusing. The only students not laughing were the three boys trying to become unbound and Lily Evans. Her eyes trained on the obvious culprit.

The scene dissolved again, but to what appeared to be a few moments later. James, Sirius, Remus, and Peter were walking from the hall, Lily catching up from behind. In truth, Harry noticed, this was not the same memory, but rather one that had to be similar. Their outfits were different and Remus looked less tired then before, probably not being around a full moon he was slightly more refreshed. They seemed to be exiting like celebrities, the sounds of laughter reverberating from withing the hall, pride in their work on full display.

"Leave him alone!" Lily called after them.

"Come on, Evans, it's not a big deal. Not like he doesn't deserve it, either." James replied.

"He does not."

"Why, because he's your friend? You two are so close? He has a funny way of showing it." James scoffed.

"We are friends!"

"Then why don't you go sit with him during dinner? Or in class? Hmm? Blimey Evans, aren't you supposed to be smart?"

"Shut up, Potter." She sped up, brushing past him.

"Oi! Ask him and his bloody death eater friends why he doesn't talk to you in public! See what he really thinks of you! What all those pure blood fanatics in Slytherin think of people like you!" James persisted. Lily reared back, leveling eye contact with him.

"Shove off, Potter. Leave me and Sev alone." James flinched slightly at her threatening voice before falling silent. After a moment he recovered from her anger. He looked far from remorseful and far from ready to quit.

* * *

**How'd the First year go? Suggestions? Comments?**


	4. Chapter 4

"Harry..."

"Harry.."

The echoing voices of Ron and Hermione brought Harry back from the pensieve. He was enjoying some of the highlights or Sirius and James' first year escapades that Harry was sure Sirius had added in just for fun when they called him back. Though witnessing his father prank students ranging from innocent bystanders to even the Slytherin prefects hardly helped him see the responsible, honorable man he was supposed to see, Harry still couldn't help but gain a few laughs from their exploits. They put George and...just thinking the names brought him with a screeching halt back into the present.

"Are you okay, Harry? What happened? Are you upset with us?" Hermione asked as she fretted over him.

"Calm down, 'Mione." Ron soothed.

"Don't call me that _Ronald._" She struck back.

"I saw them in first year," Harry began, in an attempt to quell the argument before he would have to dive back into the pensieve.

"What did you see?" Ron asked, forgetting the retort he had planned for Hermione.

He recounted all he could remember from the pensieve, even the friendship between Snape and his mother, despite the fact that he, himself, not quite adapted to the idea of Snape and his mother being anything but enemies, let alone friends. Throughout the two listened intensely and Harry actually felt relieved that he would be able to have their perspective on the matter.

"All in all it didn't really show me much I didn't know." Harry said with a sigh, "If Remus was trying to make me see them in love, I don't think he's quite done it."

"I don't think that _was_ the intention," Hermione reasoned, "I think he wanted to show you the truth. If you only saw the good memories, you'd probably think he was lying to you."

"I guess you're right." Harry said.

"Besides, mate, just because they hated each other then, doesn't mean they always did. They probably just fancy each other and don't know how to tell the other." Ron reasoned. There was a beat of silence among the group as the obvious parallel struck each one and a blush crept upon Ron and Hermione's pallors.

"I guess I'll just have to wait and see." Harry shrugged again, "In the meantime, I have some ridiculous meeting with the ministry tomorrow morning about accused Death Eaters or some such nonsense. I should probably get to bed."

..........

The two bade Harry goodnight and left him on his own. They walked in silence down the steps of Grimauld place, Hermione contemplating the exact same thing Ron was trying to forget. At the doorstep they paused, he rubbed his neck awkwardly. She looked up at him expectantly, wondering what he was trying to say, if he was going to comment on the tremendous inadvertent confession he may or may not have made.

"Hermione..." he started.

"Yes, Ron?" She breathed. She felt herself inch closer, assuring herself mentally it was in response to his own movement.

"I can't disapparate."

"...what?"

"The ministry's back in full swing and, well, I never actually got my license. I was wondering if you could take us back to the Burrow, you're staying there tonight anyway, right?" He explained as Hermione made every attempt not to throttle him by the neck and strangle that adorable goofy grin off his face.

"Of course," She replied through gritted teeth, that, in an unfortunate betrayal of her feelings, softened the moment he took her by the hand in preparation and closed the gap between them.

With a familiar whoosh they were back at the burrow, which had long since gone dark of light, though they both knew Mrs. Weasley was still up, waiting for them to return so she knew they were safe. She still did it for Harry, though he moved into Grimauld place to accommodate the sheer number of people staying in her home. They suspected she hadn't really slept since Fred, but any approach to talk to her about her own issues were deftly turned onto their own. Hermione's questions turned into questions about her parents, Ron's about his time away from home. It was uncanny and troubling how she managed to do it.

"Ron?" Hermione ventured as they entered the Burrow, about to go their separate ways.

"Yeah?"

"That thing about Harry's parents...how hating each other doesn't mean they don't f-fancy each other...do you really think that?" She asked, the dark preventing her from gaging his reaction.

"Course I do." He said after a pause. She waited for elaboration as to why as another pause made her feel anxious.

"G'night 'Mione." was all she got. It would have to do for now.

..........

Harry awoke some hours later, his dreams mixed with memories that weren't really his and memories he wished weren't his. As usual he woke up to the stony silence of his Godfather's home, got ready, and immediately made his way to the Burrow. He knew if he didn't go there immediately, he would never hear the end of it from Mrs. Weasley. It was a comfort to him to know she cared, even after what he had cost her family.

Once there he enjoyed a brief breakfast with the family and Hermione, who seemed determined not to look Ron's way, though the boy was oblivious to her actions. He smirked slightly at the sight of her rather obvious, somewhat cowardly movements, until of course, he caught sight of Ginny and immediately became far more interested in the pancakes on his plate. Anything but make eye contact with her.

"Harry, are you ready to go?" Mr. Weasley asked him, stirring him from his feigned attempts at casual.

"Yes, Mr. Weasley." He responded immediately, rising from the table and joining Arthur Weasley at the fireplace.

He followed Artur into the fire and to the Ministry of Magic. There were few places he loathed quite as much as this place. It was with intense satisfaction, however, upon his first return there to see that the horrendous statue that had been placed within its walls had been thoroughly destroyed, though there didn't seem to be a lot of other damage to the building.

"Collateral damage." Was all Mr. Weasley would say on the matter, though there was a glint in his eye that made Harry no longer question where Fred and George had gotten their mischievous smirks from.

"Now, Harry, I know this will be difficult for you, but I don't want you to worry, if this is too much too soon we can schedule this for another time. Like it or not you did save the Ministry's tail not too long ago, I'm sure you have pull enough to postpone these meetings" Artur cautioned.

"I'll be fine," Harry responded with resolve he wasn't quite sure he had.

The morning meetings progressed in much the glacial speed they had every morning for the past few weeks. Arthur, Kingsley Shacklebolt, and a few others arguing over semantics and politics, while Harry thought of other things. How he would much prefer he was playing Quidditch or hanging out with Ron and Hermione, or, much more frequently, how he would much rather be spending his time with Ginny. That afternoon, however, was different. It was that afternoon in which several suspected Death Eaters were placed in custody and questioned.

Harry had his doubts as to why he even had to attend these meetings, they were mostly there to formalize the charges being brought against people. There were some who were clearly guilty, still spouting the return of the Dark Lord and other such nonsense. There were others who seemed more repentant, ones Harry could at least understand acted to save themselves or their families and made poor decisions. The meetings, however, were long and Harry was beginning to grow restless. He was about to ask why it was he was there, when in through the doors walked the next person to be formally charged.

Draco Malfoy.

* * *

**Ah finals week, thou art a heartless bitch. **

**Sorry I posted it a day late, I've got a bit distracted by studying for next week.**

**Anyway, how is it going so far? Comments? Suggestion? Review, please, and let me know how I'm doing.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Sorry for the delay on an update, but I finished my finals weeks and updates should be more reliable.**

**Thanks to everyone who's read, marked as a favorite, and to Chiarscuro for the wonderful review I can't possibly live up to.**

**Enjoy.**

* * *

Harry slammed the door behind himself, hoping that the gesture would be enough to ward off those behind from entering the room in pursuit. He should have known that it would not be enough to stop Ron Weasley in the middle of an argument. There were few things on earth that could stop Ron from arguing.

On the scale of things Ron loved to argue about with vigor and passion there were also very few things above the name Draco Malfoy. It was understandable to Harry. The boy had treated Ron and his family like dirt and the girl he loved like a second class citizen. Of course Ron would be upset that someone who hated everyone he loved was being given a free pass. Even more upset when that second chance comes from Harry. Harry, Draco's nemesis. Harry, savior of the wizarding world from Draco's precious Dark Lord. Helping him was damn near unforgivable in Ron's book.

"You've got to be bloody kidding me!" Ron had shouted at Harry once he detailed his encounter with their schoolmate.

"Ron..." Hermione cautioned slowly, taking the boy's hand.

"It's not his fault he did what he did." Harry tried to reason.

"Oh? Not his fault he tried to make our lives miserable in school? Not his fault he called Her-Hermione those...awful things? Not his rutting fault he joined up with-"

"Enough Ron. I know he's not perfect. He's a bloody git, I know that. But he made a bad decision in order to follow his father. If you're dad-"

"Do not even suggest-" Ron cautioned darkly.

"His mother saved my life." Harry retorted, derailing his other argument, knowing even suggesting in the hypothetical that Ron's father could have been a Death Eater would only make matters worse, "If not for her, Voldemort would have won. You may not like Draco, hell, _I_ don't like him, but I'm doing this because at the very least I owe her this." He finished, slamming the door on Ron and Hermione and rushing up to the pensieve, hoping to escape in someone else's life for a short time once again.

..........

When the first memory materialized he was shocked to see James and Lily in the same room. That alone seemed unlikely after their last encounter during first year, even a year later, but then to see them laughing was completely unreal. Immediately he felt awash with warmth, wanting nothing more than to stay in this moment, with both his parents happy.

Professor McGonagall was marching before them and the rest of Gryffindor in a militant manner. She was a force to be reckoned with, to be sure. Harry could not imagine anyone laughing in the face of her and he knew his parents must have been brave to do so but he could see why they found her amusing. Strutting before them with intensity usually reserved for transfiguration exams she looked quite comical under the circumstances.

"This is quite serious, children." She snapped, silencing the group, though Harry noticed that James and Lily actually exchanged a look of amusement for just a fraction of a second before returning their attention both to McGonagall and their respective friends.

"I will look forward to all of your attendance tomorrow. All of you." She finished.

"So what do you reckon?" Sirius asked James.

"Yeah, think I might do. You?" James responded.

"Nah, quidditch is not really my thing," Sirius replied off hand, "Besides, it would take serious time away my studies." He finished in a mock serious tone, through a thoroughly mischievous grin. James and Remus laughed.

Harry chuckled a bit, relishing in a playful memory all the more since his argument with Ron had forced him into a dark mood. He knew the professor's intensity over quidditch quite well. With Voldemort around he knew the woman probably didn't have the option of enjoying too much of it, especially his last few years at Hogwarts. Seeing her in her natural competitive form also gave him a small joy, knowing she would be able to hopefully renew that vigor once school started up again.

"How about you, Evans, fancy yourself a quidditch player?" James asked. She scoffed a bit.

"I don't even want to know how to play." She answered.

"Oh, what, Snivellous didn't teach you about it?" Sirius mocked, "Guess _he_ can't play very well."

"Come on, Sirius." Remus said, pushing the boy further along before Lily could retaliate.

"I can teach you if you want, Evans." James offered with a toothy grin, "I've been playing for a while. I'm quite good you know."

"I'm sure _you _think so." She replied. James put on a face of mock hurt.

"You think I can't make the team, then?" He challenged.

"I don't really care if you do." She answered breezily, leaving him standing where he was for Remus and Sirius to return to fetch him.

"What was that all about?" Remus asked.

"I'm going to make that team." Was James' only reply.

..........

Shortly thereafter Harry was in the stands as James soared overhead to the cheers of the Gryffindor house as his quaffle made its way to a goal. Harry stood beside Remus and Sirius as they cheered loudly for their friend. A few seats down he noticed Lily sitting quietly reading despite the uproarious noise and he once again was reminded of Hermione. It endeared him more and more to his mother and to Hermione to see their similarities. He was willing to bet James was none too thrilled to see her indifference. He was also willing to bet that maybe Lily Evans was a little too much like Hermione, and was only pretending not to notice the boy who exasperated her.

..........

Materializing in the dormitories James was watching Remus through suspicious eyes as the boy move around the room. Sirius sat relaxed on what Harry knew was Lupin's bed. Remus gave the boy a withering stare, but allowed him to stay where he was. Harry deduced that perhaps it was because he wouldn't be using the bed tonight.

"So, you have to go see Madame Pomphrey again?" James asked, confirming Harry's assumption.

"Yeah. I'm not feeling very well." Remus reluctantly replied.

"Again." James said flatly.

"I've g-got a weak stomach I guess. Not really used to it here."

"After a whole year." James pressed.

"Lay off, James," Sirius yawned, "Just gives us more space. You need it with Peter constantly up your arse."

"Right. Must go." Remus replied, rushing off.

"You guys don't find it a bit odd that he's always sick?" James asked.

"Whatever," Sirius said, "He's gets ill. What can we do?"

"It's just...strange." James persisted.

"If it was really a problem, I'm sure he would tell us. We're his best friends." Sirius tried to assure an unconvinced James.

..........

"James, this is silly." Sirius whispered as they walked through the darkened halls of Hogwarts with Harry not far behind.

"Come on, I'm telling you something is wrong with Remus. It can't be normal to spend three days in the hospital wing every month." James persisted, leading the way.

"It also can't be normal for someone to go around counting sick days, mate." Sirius said.

"Maybe he has a condition of some sort. I'm sure he doesn't want us snooping around something private." Peter piped up from behind Sirius, who rolled his eyes at the boy.

Before they reached the hospital wing they heard footsteps ahead of them. They paused for a moment, trapped between suits of armor there was nowhere to hide from prefects. It was not a prefect coming around the corner, but rather Lily and Severus coming from some other unknown area. Both James and Harry's eyes narrowed at the scene in front of them. The were sharing a laugh before noticing the company.

"Oh!" Lily said in shock as she noticed who it was, a blush reaching her cheeks, no doubt embarrassed to be caught after hours despite her many scoldings of the indiscretion aimed at the same three people who had just caught her.

"What are you doing after hours-" Severus began to ask.

"Don't be an idiot, you're out after hours too, _Sev_, so sod off." James said as he continued to his destination undeterred, not catching the glare Lily gave him as she continued along with Severus.

"Look!" James said pointedly once they reached the wing.

"The beds are empty." Peter pointed out.

"Where's Remus?" Sirius asked, finally believing James, who merely stared at the empty beds with intensity.

..........

It was clearly the next morning as Sirius and Peter looked exhausted sitting beside a silent James. They were waiting for Remus to return as he always did the morning after one of his nights spent away from the dorm to prepare for class. Normally he crept in far after James, Sirius, and Peter had made their way to breakfast.

"What exactly is the plan here, James?" Sirius asked, probably not for the first time.

"I don't know." James replied, also not the for the first time, illiciting a frustrated groan from Sirius.

Suddenly, Remus came hurrying into the room. Obviously running late, he barely even noticed the three friends standing there waiting for him. As he moved to gather his books and contemplated changing his worn clothes he took a chance glance up, and finally noticed the prying eyes of three twelve year old boys.

"Oh, sorry, didn't see you guys there. I'm running a bit late, thought you would already be gone."

"Yeah, funny. You aren't late very often." Sirius said, trying his best not to be confrontational.

"No?" Remus tried to play innocent.

"Probably only two, three times a month. A far site better than me and Sirius." James feigned a chuckle. Remus blushed a bit.

"Keeping count, James?" He tried to joke, "I'd think you'd have better things to do."

"I did actually, last night. I went to visit my friend in the Hospital wing, but he wasn't there." James said seriously.

"Did you? I may not have been there. I h-had some studying to do at the library."

"Come on, mate." Sirius scoffed.

"We're worried," James said, "Is something wrong?"

"No." Remus answered weakly.

"We're your friends. You can tell us." Sirius coaxed.

"I can't tell you everything." Remus whispered.

"Course you can." Sirius continued. Remus just shook his head nervously.

"What if we guessed it?" James asked.

For a moment no one said anything. Harry looked between James and Remus. At first, the confrontation seemed pushy, like James was just trying to find out something he didn't know. Like this was just a puzzle to him. He looked into each boy's eyes though, and saw the compassion and concern James had for Remus. Remus, meanwhile, nodded to his suggestion of a guessing game. Sirius was about to make a go, but James spoke again.

"You're a werewolf." He said, not even trying to make it sound like a question, his face neutral. Sirius and Peter looked dumbfounded at the mere suggestion while Remus appeared conflicted, somewhat relieved but also frantically nervous. He simply nodded his head.

"...Blimey." Sirius whispered in the silence.

"Well come on then, we're late for class." James said suddenly, slapping Remus' back jovially, to the boys shock.

"Wait. Y-you aren't..." Remus was at a loss for words.

"Upset you were a git and didn't just tell us?" Sirius suggested after recovering, "A bit, I must admit."

"I'm a w-werewolf. It's not exactly something to be proud of. I can understand if you don't want to be friends anymore. In case anything gets out."

"Now why on earth would we want to do that?" James asked simply. There was doubt in Remus' eyes.

"Yeah, come on, mate," Sirius said as they made their way to class, "You're not nearly as hairy as that Hufflepuff prefect. You know, the one girl who tried to stop us from transfiguring the toilets? You don't smell nearly as bad Peter-"

"Hey!"

As the group assured Remus that his being a werewolf didn't make them want to stop being his friend Harry felt a pang, wishing his own friendship with Ron was that strong these days. They were willing to stick together through thick and thin. He was beginning to doubt whether his own circle of friends were able to do the same.

* * *

**Comments? Suggestions? Let me know how it was and review please.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Well whoops. I thought this posted last Friday but apparently not. Here it is now.**

* * *

"This is where you go every time?"

"It's not too bad. A little lonely at first."

"I thought it was supposed to be haunted."

"Just by me."

Remus had taken his friends to the shrieking shack, upon James' request to see just exactly where it was he went every time he went through his transformation. They stood a safe distance away, just behind some fencing, despite now knowing full well there was nothing dangerous about the place, so long as Remus was with them.

"Lonely?" James asked.

"Well, there aren't a whole lot of other students coming to spend their time with a dangerous creature." Remus retorted.

"Come on, it's not that bad. Maybe we can join you." James offered. Remus snorted, but soon turned serious upon seeing the look on his friend's face.

"James, no. I'm not going to invite you in and give you tea in there. I'll tear you apart." Remus proclaimed. James just looked skeptical.

"I'm not an idiot, Remus. I've got an idea." He smiled much like Harry remembered Sirius did when he came up with a dubiously thought out plan.

A few moments later the four friends sat inside Tranfiguration, James' hand shot up as McGonagall finished her sentence. She looked a bit shocked that James was showing any interest in the subject, as did Lily and Remus.

"I was wondering about being Animagus. How is it done?" James announced.

McGonagall had another surprised look on her features, as her lesson that afternoon was on turning a thimble into a teacup. Hardly on topic. The class murmured a bit as she, slightly delighted someone was taking extra interest in the subject, began to describe rules, regulations and basic principles. In the meantime, Sirius caught up with James and his idea, a smile creeping across his face at the same pace a look of horror crossed Remus'.

"Perhaps the library will be of more use to you Mr. Potter. As well as the rest of you class. There will be an essay due by the end of the week on the subject of Animagus transfiguration." The Professor announced.

She was met with groans that were immediately silenced by a well placed glare. As the class continued, James was distracted taking notes from memory about what she had told him. Lily, meanwhile, was distracted by James, as she looked at him incredulously, thoughts whirring.

..........

With a final glance, Harry sighed, and returned to his place outside of the pensieve. He was not surprised to see that Ron and Hermione had left him there. Ron was fuming and Hermione had likely followed to calm him down. He would have been slightly upset at her favoring Ron, not because she was following him because of her emotional attachment, but rather because she would leave him alone with no one to discuss the memories with. He was not upset, however, because he was not alone.

As he returned he gathered his surroundings quickly, out of habit, and immediately noticed Ginny sitting atop the Sirius' bed. As he regained his grounding in reality she rose to greet him. He felt awkward and unsure of how to greet the girl. She seemed slightly less unsure as she placed her arm around him and guided him to the bed to sit.

"Ginny? What are you-" Harry began to ask, but figured Hermione must have asked her to be there for him. "Ron still being a git?" He asked instead. She chuckled slightly.

"I don't think he ever stops." She joked, "Though this time I think he may actually have a point." She ventured.

"Not you too, Ginny." He groaned, "I'm not going to explain this to him over and over again. He's just going to have to get used to the fact-"

"That you're letting a death eater go free?" She interrupted, though this time Harry fell silent. "That you're letting one of the people who are responsible, whether he wanted to or not, for the death of so many people...including our brother? That may not be too easy for him. Or me."

"His mum saved me. _He_ saved us." Harry weakly retorted, "At the Manor. He didn't tell Bellatrix who we were. He bought us time."

"He told you that?" She asked, he nodded, "The same guy who plead allegiance to Voldemort in the first place so he could survive? Think maybe there's a reoccurring theme here with Draco and his desire to live?"

Harry and Ginny sat in silence for a while as he thought this over. There was justification, he knew, for why they weren't happy with his decision to help Draco. The thought of Draco being a constant reminder of the loss of Fred was almost enough for him to change his mind and let the wanker rot in Azkaban. But Harry could not do it, not only for the reasons he explained to her but for the one he was keeping to himself.

He was holding out hope for something bigger. Not just an end to the war he was forced to fight, but to the animosity that caused it in the first place. If not for the segregation Tom Riddle believed in, Severus Snape believed in, Draco Malfoy believed in, there may never have been a problem. If there wasn't a rivalry that made Gryffindor hate Slytherin and vice versa, things may have been different. He couldn't quite explain, even to himself, why he was ultimately deciding to try to change things. All he knew was he had to do this to get it started. He didn't want friends like Snape and Lily to be torn apart because of what house they were under.

"I have to do this, Ginny." He finally said.

"I know. You can be a git sometimes too." She said breezily. He chuckled, "You learn anything new about your parents?" She asked, changing the subject.

"Just that they're a lot stronger than me." He said.

"What makes you think that?"

"My father stuck by his friends no matter what. I'm beginning to wonder whether or not I do the same thing. Or if they'd to the same for me." Harry sighed.

"Yeah, because traipsing across the whole of the country with you aimlessly is hardly devotion." She said slightly indignantly.

"You know what I mean. Ron and I fight over this stupid Draco thing even after all we've been through. After only two years in school together my dad stuck by Remus despite everything he was taught about werewolves."

"Well, I think you may have a lot to think about, Harry. Especially about how much you think your friends care." She said with a smile, handing him a note before leaving him with his thoughts.

He looked at the spot she had just been for a bit, then back at the note, hoping it was her saying they could get back together and all the weird awkwardness he felt around her wasn't important. They could forget the last year and just start back up again. He was somewhat disappointed to see it wasn't even addressed to him.

_Gin, _

_Harry's being a right tit at the moment. Hermione's taking me to get some space before I murder the Git- Who- Lived but he's looking into the pensieve Remus gave him. He may need someone to talk to, so I need you to go over and help him if he needs it._

_-Ron_

_P.S If you show him this note I'll bloody well murder you too. _

_

* * *

_

**Well sorry about that. I guess I just uploaded and didn't post. On the bright side I still plan to update Friday, so two chapters this week...that's good, right?**


	7. Chapter 7

When Harry arrived at the Burrow the next day he had a sneaking suspicion that, though most would not say it directly to him, the Weasley family was somewhat firmly on Ron's side in the matter of Draco Malfoy. A part of him wished they would just yell at him, call him a moron like Ron and let them know how upset they were with him. Instead they acted like everything was normal but with the knowledge that they knew he knew they knew what he was doing. It gave him a headache just thinking about it.

Still, though, they treated him like family as usual. Molly gave him a heaping plate of food for breakfast as Arthur discussed his plans for the day-more mindless meetings. He had given Harry the day off, Harry suspected because of the whole incident the day before with Draco but gladly accepted a morning without politics. Sitting at breakfast their conversation hit a lull as Ron trotted down the stairs and to the table. A pregnant silence filled the air as Ron obliviously began to shovel food onto his plate.

Talk resumed once again, Arthur and Molly discussed what time he would be returning home that evening, with her insisting it be sometime before daybreak the next day unlike the night before. Hermione was giggling at a joke Ron had told her and opening up the newspaper that had just arrived. and Harry even participated in a light hearted discussion of Quidditch with Ginny, who was still adamant that the Harpies had a shot next season.

Suddenly there was a loud _slam_ upon the table as Ron stood, chair scratching upon the floor just as loudly, and leaving before anyone could ask what was the matter. One look upon Hermione's face made him think for a moment it was her doing. The two of them fighting was the only thing that could make Ron that irate. Before he could ask her what she had done she slid the paper to him, allowing him to read the headline:

**Harry Potter Helps Dark Lord's Followers**

He looked at the headline with presumably the same amount of disgust Ron had before turning the thing over and sighing internally. He was unsure of whether or not to follow Ron, and possibly get in another row about it, or stay with the family, who were likely to be just as uncomfortable with it as he was. Instead of doing either he quietly rose to leave, knowing exactly where to go to get away.

..........

As if on cue he was immediately greeted with the serene scene of Remus quietly studying by the lake. A year from his friends discovering his secret he seemed much more relaxed with his life. Gone was the pale face and bags beneath eyes far too youthful for them. He still had his issue, obviously, but he seemed much more comfortable and Harry knew part of that was thanks to his father.

The silence he was enjoying, however, did not last long as Lily and Severus came along and while she gave Remus a smile it was clear the two were arguing. Snape did not even glance Lupin's way as he continued to walk slightly behind the angry girl. Harry noticed, however, that Remus was listening, in that same unassuming manner he tended to use to overhear important information without notice.

"I think you're being a little too harsh." She proclaimed, assuming they were out of earshot.

"_Harsh?_" Snape scoffed, " You're defending Potter?"

"_No_, I can't stand him just like you, I just...I don't really understand what happened, actually."

"He attacked Avery. My friend, just like you." Snape defended. Harry's eyes narrowed.

"After Avery said that to Mary, _my_ friend. Which, judging by the reaction of everyone including Professor Slughorn, was not appropriate." Lily countered. Snape stiffened a bit.

"Lily-"

"What _does_ it mean, Sev?" She asked suddenly, eyes narrowed. Snape shifted uncomfortably, but was saved having to answer by, of all people, James Potter.

"Oi, _Snivellous!_" He shouted, catching both their attention. Harry was unsure if he looked relieved about not having to answer or upset at James' presence.

Remus was still pretending to read, but still alert to what was transpiring as Peter and even Sirius hung back, detecting the foul mood James was in. Harry noticed the ever vigilant boy had one hand on his wand, probably ready to diffuse the situation. James, meanwhile, was making it all too apparent he had his wand at the ready.

"Should have known you'd defend someone who spews such nonsense!" James shouted as he approached the boy, keeping him pinned between a tree and the tip of his wand.

"James-" Peter tried to diffuse.

"No!" He shouted, "This ponce wants to get me expelled then the very least I can do is earn it." James proclaimed, truly furious, and having some difficulty deciding between hex or just an old fashioned punch to the face. Looking down to his hand Harry noticed that apparently a battle with his fist had already transpired.

For a moment Lily looked truly conflicted, as if perhaps she was noticing the same thing others had seen before her. In front of her stood the boy she hated and her first friend, but the roles were not right. It should be Snape defending her friend from the actions of the callous James and his friends, not the other way around. She only allowed a hint of hesitation, just enough to let Snape know she was not happy, to pass before she pushed James' wand down, granting Snape a moment to get his own.

"Leave him alone." She interjected.

"Come on, Evans," James groaned, "You can't honestly think I'll just let him get away with-"

"Something not nearly as bad as half the things you've gotten away with!"

"I've never done anything as bad as allowing someone t-to say..._that_ about anyone!" James sputtered with indignation.

Lily's position between the two boys did not waver, holding them at stalemate. The future couple stared at each other intensely. Finally, realizing he would have to go through her to get to Snape, James sneered and relented. He shook his head in disgust at the pair.

"Defending the person who thinks you're inferior." He muttered as he left.

Lily turned back to Severus, who looked angrily at the retreating James for a moment longer, before facing the girl's gaze. Immediately his face fell, guilt washing any anger off. Any hope that he would not have to explain the truth of what had happened disappeared with that anger.

"So what exactly does Mudblood mean, Sev?"

..........

Relishing slightly at the idea of Snape having to explain and ideal he believed in, at least enough to join Voldemort, Harry was disappointed to feel himself being tugged away to another time. His disappointment was short lived, however, as he found himself in one of the bathrooms, Snape and Avery on one side, terror in their eyes before a grinning James and Sirius.

"Seems they might be having a bit of trouble." Sirius commented.

"I think you might be right, Sirius. Need some help there?" James playfully asked.

"What did you do?" Avery frantically asked.

"Well, we know how much you guys don't like anyone who isn't a pureblood..." Sirius began to explain.

"We figured we'd just help you guys get rid of anything that made you like them." James continued.

"You know, help you guys with your superiority. Wouldn't want to be doing things those filthy muggleborns do." Sirius chuckled.

"Couldn't help but notice they certainly do like to use the restroom, don't they?"

"And since they do it..."

"Why one earth would you need to? I mean, they're inferior, they do stuff you're above."

"So you're clearly above having to take a piss, right guys?" They finished in unison.

"How did you-" Snape began to ask as he attempted to remove unzip the slacks beneath his robes once more to no avail.

"Well now," Sirius said with mock hurt, "If we told you that then what would be the fun?"

"Besides," James pointed out, puffing out his chest a bit, "You're Slytherins. We're Gryffindor. Brawny over brains, right _Sev? _If a couple dimwits like us could do it, surely you honorable pureblood Slytherin should be able to take care of this no problem." James finished and exited with Sirius, holding back tears of laughter as the pair of Slytherin tried frantically to remove their bottoms with no success. The memory faded, leaving Harry wondering how, or if the two figured out how to resolve their issue, or if they had to make a rather embarrassing trek to the aid of some adult.

..........

Somewhat surprisingly he next found a, sadly unsoiled, Severus Snape walking through the Great Hall, once again accompanied by Avery. He skipped passed Lily without greeting, though he gave her a small smile before directing the boy beside him to a girl Harry did not recognize. He heard a reluctant, unrepentant apology slip through the gritted teeth of Snape's ally directed at the girl. Quite shocked the girl managed to stiffly nod her head in acceptance.

The act had hardly repaired the damage tallied to the relationship between the Gryffindors and Slytherins. The mere presence of the two anywhere near a Gryffindor had put both groups of students on edge. If anything, it had made Snape of all people look _worse_ both to the Gryffindors who assumed he was lying or planning something heinous, and the Slytherins, who viewed his apology as a betrayal. There was only one person positively beaming about the incident. Lily Evans. That was clearly more than enough for Snape to justify his actions.

* * *

**Comments? Suggestions? Review.**


	8. Chapter 8

**Sorry, late again. Here it is now.**

* * *

Harry paused for a moment after watching the memories of his parents' third year at Hogwarts. He was finding it more and more difficult to pull himself away from their memories. It was more and more difficult to convince himself that heading back to the real world was a good thing. It had used to be the other way around. His hesitation, however, was reluctantly dismissed. He couldn't stay there forever.

Stepping away from the pensieve he was once again pleased to find Ginny waiting for him. This time, she seemed less patient with his time spent within memories. Her impatience tempted him once again to jump back in, ignore his issues with her and Ron and the rest of the damned wizarding world and just spend a little more time in the pensieve.

"Harry, I think you need a break." She said, Her eyes flickered to the pensieve and Harry felt himself get defensive.

"From what?" He tested.

"From everything," She said slowly, "My prat of a brother, the ministry, the adoring public. They gave you a day off for a reason, don't spend it all inside. Come play Quidditch with me." She offered, his tension relaxing at the mere suggestion of the game.

"Who's coming? I don't think a lot of other people are free to just play a game. Ron certainly isn't willing to-"

"I don't think I mentioned anyone else tagging along." Ginny answered.

Though her face did not give anything away the cogs in Harry's brain slowly began to turn at her words. Quidditch. With her. _Alone_. He cursed her unresponsive face. He would give anything for her to wink or a raised eyebrow. Anything to let him know she was thinking the same thing he was and that he wasn't just a perverted git who thought she was inviting him out on a date. Again, he wished he was back in the pensieve where he had no control. No decisions were being made by him, he just let everything happen.

"Ron has nightmares." Ginny stated, interrupting his reverie, before he could answer.

He said nothing. While it was not hard to see Ron having trouble at night, Harry was somewhat shocked he wasn't having the same issue, he was almost certain the revelation was not intended for Harry to help Ron. It was a statement insisting she be let in. She wanted to know what had happened those months away from home and school.

All three of them had given the same story to the ministry, giving them only the most important information- they were searching for ways to defeat Voldemort, they were on the run, the eventually succeeded. Vague was all the Ministry needed, and deserved to be perfectly frank. It wasn't what she deserved, but it was all he was willing to give now. None of them were prepared to reveal too much. He certainly couldn't list all the reasons her brother might be having nightmares because of him.

"Is there anything I can do?" Harry decided to reply with.

"He's got Hermione. They've been spending nights together ever since your fight." Harry looked somewhat shocked, and she smiled slightly, "He usually sleeps on the floor in my room. I assume it's the same situation when they're in his." She explained.

"Is it helping?" He asked. She shrugged in response.

"She's at her wit's end, I think. He won't tell her what it's about. Makes it difficult to help with."

Harry shook his head at his friend and chuckled, lightening the mood. Ron was not exactly forthcoming with his feelings to be sure, but he was willing to upset Hermione even more by not telling her just to keep some stupid pride. Pride. Just the word made his stomach drop. Why exactly was it he wasn't talking to his friend?

He observed Ginny as she mumbled something about how a good shag would set the two right. He marveled at how ridiculously adorable she looked, even when she was talking about something as repulsive as Ron and Hermione having sex. He thought hard about why he had broken up with her over a year ago. It seemed so silly now. Everything seemed so silly now. All of it.

For the first time in a little while, he felt a genuine smile. Ginny, still on a tirade about their clueless friends noticed his amusement and stopped, looking at him curiously. He was willing to bet she was finding him smiling about as odd as he was. He tried to remember the last time she smiled a legitimate smile, one that did not have ghosts clouding her eyes and revealing the lie upon her lips. Harry decided it had been far too long for her. For him. For everyone. Ron, Hermione, The Weasleys, even Draco. The least he could do was make that time a little shorter for some of them. He grabbed her hand, placing it firmly in his with confidence he didn't know he had when it came to Ginny Weasley. Nerves disappeared as she smiled.

"Gin, let's go play Quidditch. Just the two of us."

* * *

**So apparently having a job, volunteering, and friends that insist I don't become the hermit I kind of want to be can suck up some free time. Sorry for the late update, but the next should be up on time this Friday. This one's kind of short and to be perfectly honest I thought was kind of bad. Agree? Disagree? Review and let me know!**


	9. Chapter 9

**Thanks to everyone reading and favoriting and to Love Among the Ruins for the pair of reviews. Enjoy.**

* * *

Walking back from the makeshift pitch behind the Burrow nothing was solved for Harry. Ron wasn't talking to him, the road to recovery from the war was still long and arduous, and his relationship with Ginny was questionable at best. He didn't care.

Back in the air with Ginny, deftly swooping on his broom as if he had never even been off it Harry just felt right with the world. Ignoring all the questions that hung in the air he and Ginny just had fun. Something that had been long missing in all their lives. They played until starlight was the only thing to guide them back home.

Walking hand in hand he dared not test the boundaries of their reformed relationship, but as he flooed back to Grimmauld place Harry felt at ease, a smile on his face that, despite what would come in the morning with the meetings and stony silences and grief, would remain for the evening. He would make sure of it.

----------

His first memory back James let out a giant sigh before plopping onto his bed. Exasperated he looked expectantly to his friends, wanting them to question his annoyance. Instead, Remus continued reading a large tome while Sirius and Peter played chess loudly. Despite the games penchant for silent contemplation, Sirius had managed to find a way to make the game slightly more audible, jeering and his opponents moves whilst cheering as his men marched toward definite victory, broken pieces of Pettigrew's men lying in the path.

"Something the matter, James?" Remus asked after another, more obvious sigh. His eyes, however, did not move from the page in front of him.

"Aren't you guys a little bored?" James asked.

"What, right now? No I rather like destroying Peter here at every go." Sirius joked.

"No, just with this," James explained, gesturing to the whole of the school, "The whole thing, it seems like we've done everything to do here."

"Haven't won the Quidditch cup yet," Peter mumbled. James did not miss the comment and stared him daggers.

"I don't know what you mean," Remus replied, "It's school. It's not designed to amuse you."

"I suppose, but there's only so many time I can hex Snivellous before I get a bit bored." James sighed.

"I disagree, mate," Sirius said with a laugh as his knight took out Peter's queen.

"A change of pace would be nice, that's all I'm saying." James declared, before lying back onto his bed.

"Well, according to my book-" Remus started, only to be met with groans, he continued anyway, "There used to be a Triwizard Tournament held every few years." James perked up a bit, intrigued, "A champion, the best from each school, would compete for the pride of the school." Remus explained.

"That sounds wicked. Why'd they stop it?" Sirius asked.

"Too many deaths, I think." Remus explained nonchalantly, Peter grew a bit pale at the suggestion.

"I'd-of done it." James declared after some silence. Sirius scoffed a bit, James glared at him, "Who else would be the best in the school?" James reasoned arrogantly.

"Well you couldn't have. It's just for the older students." Remus continued, much to James' chagrin.

"So what, we just get to watch? Hardly seems like fun."

"Well, there was a ball as well." Remus tried.

"What, we get to dance around a bit?" Sirius scoffed, "I'd rather risk death." James, however, was deep in thought.

"Around Christmas time as a gesture of good faith or what have you," Remus continued, ignoring Sirius, "Girls and guys-"

"Oh," Sirius perked up, "Who'd you bring then? If we had a ball?" Sirius asked his chess partner, Peter looked like he was in shock with a mere question.

"Oh, we-well I guess m-maybe Mary, she's quite pretty. Or tha-that Hufflepuff girl-" Peter started, getting a bit worked up.

"Alright mate, I think you'd have better luck just taking the first _thing_ to say yes. I hear maybe on of the spiders in the Forbidden Forest is available." Sirius mocked.

"Alright, who'd you take then?" Peter countered.

"Now why would I want to _bring _someone to the ball?" Sirius asked, smirking, "When I can dance with all of them?" Remus chuckled and shook his head, "And you, then? Remus?"

"I don't think I'd bring anyone either," Remus said after a moment of thought.

"You old dog, you. Now you're with me," Sirius said, slapping him on the back.

"I just don't think it would be safe. What if it was on a full moon?" The group groaned.

"Come on, mate. You can't pin everything on you furry little problem. You do that, and how will you do anything with your life?" James said.

Harry smiled at his father's advice. He was glad Remus had finally listened to him, even if it was years later, when he decided to be with Tonks. Remus had always had a problem with his werewolf side, he was just glad the man, for whatever brief period he had, lived a little. Without that, Harry would not have little Teddy to remember him by.

"James, your turn." Peter said, "Who would you bring?"

"Lily Evans." James said with little hesitation. There was a pause in the air before all three boys burst into laughter, right in his face. James looked genuinely surprised at the reaction, "What? What's so funny?"

"Mate, no offense-" Remus said between giggles.

"She _hates_ you." Sirius finished for him.

"Not _that_ much." James whimpered a bit.

"Sorry, but it's true."

"Come on, we joke around, insult each other now and then but it's not like we're mortal enemies."

"Of all the people here, I think you've chosen the one girl you will never have a chance with."

"It can't be that bad."

"I bet you anything she will say no."

James milled this offer over. Harry watched, waiting for the light bulb to go on in James' head. For him to realize that all the pranks he had pulled on random students, her friend Snape, the fact that, despite spending most of his time in detention and quidditch practice his grades rivaled hers, that his arrogant attitude was probably worse than those future Death Eaters he hated so much, was enough to make her hate him. Instead he had on a face that seemed to accept the open challenge for Lily's heart.

Harry's heart sank at the sight. Was his mother only a defiant step to prove to others he could get whatever he wanted? Was she just a conquest? The thought that this was the reason his parents had gotten together seemed disgusting. What lies had he used to convince the girl to love him? Anger swelled in Harry's heart at his father.

"Whatever. There isn't some stupid ball to go to anyway. This conversation is pointless." James said with a huff, launching himself beneath his covers and turning off the lights.

There were always limitations to the pensieve, of course. Harry could only really see what those who had put the memory in had seen. They dictated the length of the memory attached. So far, this had not been a problem for Harry as most of the scenes were tiny details, nothing too significant as far as how his parents got together. Unfortunately at this particular memory, had it gone further than when the rest of the room occupants had fallen asleep, Harry would have been able to see his father, still awake. He would have been able to see the legitimately hurt face he hid beneath the sheets of his bed and the inability to sleep that came with this knowledge that the girl he had fancied for some time hated his guts.

----------

Harry did not see this, though. Instead, he was launched to another time. He walked with Sirius and James, who were a bit early to class, much to the distaste of Sirius. So early, in fact, the only other person in the room was Lily. With a wide smile, James took the seat beside her. Lily looked at him, bewildered. As did Sirius.

"Can I help you?" She asked a bit icily.

"I think I can manage sitting down, Evans. Thank you, though. Very thoughtful." James answered cheekily. A few girls behind him giggled, he flashed them a smile. Lily rolled her eyes.

"Why are you...here?" She asked.

"Potions class." He answered, acting stupid. She huffed and turned back ahead for class. At this point, Remus and Peter had entered the room. Realizing what he was doing, Remus rolled his eyes as Peter looked giddy, giggling alongside Sirius.

Professor Slughorn entered class, ready to lecture, but paused. Noticing the recent development of James and Lily partnering together, he gave them a look before smiling, muttering something about young love. Lily seemed ready to burst out loudly upon hearing the comment, ready to insist upon the things she would rather do than date one James Potter, but for the sake of house points, James pulled her down and shushed her. It did not help her mood.

The class began to make a potion Harry could not immediately identify, Lily trying her best to tolerate her partner, who was doing his best to impress her. At least, the best he could whilst chopping pungent smelling roots. When class ended, Lily quickly gathered her things to leave. James was close behind.

"Why are you following me?" She finally asked as he continued to walk behind her.

"If I'm not mistaken, we are in the same classes, Evans. I'm pretty sure I _have _to walk this direction." He said, again, playing stupid. She rolled her eyes.

"Whatever."

"But since we _are_ talking..." He tried, she didn't glance back, "How was your last Hogsmeade trip?"

"What?"

"Hogsmeade. Did you have fun?"

"Why is this your concern?"

"Everyone should have an entertaining trip down. Have you ever been to Madame Puddifoot's?" He ventured. She turned back to him, looked at him appraisingly for a moment, before laughing.

"You can't be serious." She said between hiccups of laughter.

"Why do people never think I'm serious." James mumbled to himself.

"Because you never are." Lily said, breaking him from his small reverie.

"Well, do you want to go to Hogsmeade with me or not?" He asked, slightly put off.

"That ought to do it, mate," Sirius joked behind them, obviously neither noticing the boys. Harry hadn't even remembered they had to be there, "Flatter the girl."

"Shut it!" James exclaimed, exasperated, "Lily Evans, would you like to accompany me sometime to Hogsmeade?" He said more polite and formal.

"No." She replied simply.

"Why not?" He demanded.

"You are possibly the most annoying, insufferable person I have ever met in my entire life."

"That can't be true. You're friends with _Snape_ for Merlin's sake."

There was a wave of noise from his friends behind him, obviously realizing that insulting her friend was probably not the way to win Lily's heart. She leveled him with a menacing look. He had just proved her right and he could not even fathom why it was she was insulted. She simply left in a huff, hurrying to class, leaving James to receive a consolatory slap on the back from Sirius meant not to make him feel better, but rather smugly say "I told you so".

----------

Back in the Gryffindor common room after a series of unsuccessful attempts at a date with Lily, James had turned his attention back to helping Remus and his werewolf problem. No matter how much Harry did not care for his father's attitude toward Lily, he admired the friendship he had with Remus, Sirius, and even Peter.

The three boys had their wands turned on themselves, slowly reciting spells and swishing their wands every which way. Occasionally one would develop the odd tail or ear, earning a giggle or two from the other, but James seemed more serious than the other two. At least, he was, until he managed to transform his entire head. Quite proud of himself he transfigured it back, though only partially. Sirius did not think it was important to tell him that his nose was still quite long and horse like. It was in that moment that he decided to have another go with Lily.

Walking over, chest puffed confidently toward the girl and her friends. It was possibly the newly transformed ears that made it hard to hear the laughter from Sirius coming behind him, and his own oblivious nature that made him ignore the giggles of Lily's friends. In any case, James sauntered up to Lily, prepared to convince her to go on a date.

"Hello Evans." He started.

"Go away, Potter." She said, not looking up from her book.

"Come now, I think we've gotten off on the wrong foot." James offered, "I wanted to offer a chance to get to know each other better."

"Not interested." She replied.

"Go out with me." He finally demanded. She looked up, saw the face and burst out into laughter.

Looking offended, James followed her to the exit, wanting an explanation. Remus noticed his current state and followed suit, wanting to stop James from leaving the common room in his current state. The boy was too fast, however, and went through the portrait hole before Remus could stop him.

"Come, on Evans, I need a better explanation that 'not interested'." He cried to her retreating figure.

At that moment, Snape happened to be passing buy, speeding up to catch up to Lily and say hello, he was instead greeted by a still slightly horse faced James. Snape looked at him with amusement, almost altogether forgetting he had originally come to do, and abandoning his attempt to catch up with Lily.

"New look, Potter? It suits you." He sneered. James glared at Snape until Remus explained in whisper his current predicament. James stalked back into the common room, leaving Remus and Snape in the hallway.

"I can only imagine what sort of nonsense you lot have gotten up to, looking like that." Snape cried out to James, though his eyes never left Remus'.

* * *

**Comments? Suggestions? Review please!**


	10. Chapter 10

**Thanks to everyone reading and to Hpgrl95, Kathryn, and Black4minister for the kind reviews. Enjoy.**

* * *

Harry started the next day completely exhausted. Barely able to even keep his eyes open at breakfast from his late night with Ginny and more memories, even Ron could notice the tired expression on Harry's face. He had to swallow his meal quickly as Arthur pushed for him to get back to the Ministry for more meetings and monotony- hardly something that would help him stave off sleep.

The next thing he remembered was Arthur and Kingsley Shacklebot standing over him, Arthur with a worried expression and Kingsley's lips drawn into a straight line. Concerned for the gap in memory, Harry tried to remember what exactly had just happened, but found everything groggy and unclear.

"Whazzgoinon?" He slurred quickly jumping up. Arthur tried to hide some amusement as Kingsley remained emotionless.

"Harry, you fell asleep." Arthur explained.

"I did?" Harry asked, shame and blood rushing to his face.

"I think perhaps you should sit out the rest of the meetings this morning." Shacklebot suggested.

"I-I, no-" Harry tried to protest as Arthur gently guided him out of the room.

"Why don't you get some more rest, Harry? No one should have to suffer through these meetings. Any oppurtunity to skip out should be grasped." Arthur coerced.

"But I wanted to help at Hogwarts later." Harry pleaded. It had been too long since he had been on the school grounds.

"Maybe tomorrow." Arthur suggested, handing Harry floo powder.

Embarrassed and upset, Harry's drooping eyelids won and he flooed back to Grimmauld place. He found Sirius' room, the one he always took, and lay across the bed, closing his eyes. The darkness enveloped his eyes and felt himself drifting, drifting, drifting absolutely nowhere.

Sitting in bed he could not sleep. Not only could he not sleep, he was itching to be elsewhere now. Falling asleep in the morning meetings and making a fool of himself was apparently no problem, but sleeping when instructed to? Apparently no such luck.

Sighing to himself, realizing the task at hand was impossible, Harry rose again and paced for a few moments, pretending to contemplate doing something else other than what he knew he would eventually decide to do. Reaching beneath Sirius' bed Harry groped air. Panicked, he stuck his entire head underneath the dusty bed in search of the pensieve. It was gone.

Harry tried to remain calm as he retraced his steps from the night before, though he knew he rarely left the room with the basin. After unsuccessfully searching the rooms upstairs and failing to calm himself Harry came barreling down the stairs, forgetting his guard for a moment, even. That guard was what would have had him, wand ready, in the case of an intruder. Luckily for him, the intruder was none other than Ron, arm casually slung around the pensieve, his wand in his hand.

"What are you doing here" Harry asked as casually as possible, despite his frantic pace the moment before and their current fight, which still loomed thick in the air whenever they were in the same room.

"S'posed to make sure you sleep." Ron mumbled back in response, tone unreadable.

"Your father sent you." Harry realized, though he missed the small look of confusion on Ron's face, "Well, I tried, and I'm having some trouble. I was just going to take a look-"

"No." Ron cut off.

"What?"

"Go to sleep. No more pensieve for a while."

Harry's anger rose at the nerve of him. After days of silence because of Malfoy he was telling him now what he could and could not do? Ever since his talk with Ginny, Harry had felt guilty, knowing Ron had a reason to hate him, but this was ridiculous.

"You can't tell me-"

"I'm not really concerned with how you spend your time at the moment. I'm just supposed to make sure-"

"Who, then? Hermione?"  
"Ginny." Ron responded with finality in his tone.

Harry stood, shocked for a moment. The two of them had a wonderful evening the night before. It was half the reason he was so tired this morning. Was that the reason they had even spent that night together? Was she trying to get him away from the pensieve? Away from learning more about his parents? Anger flared at her, and at Ron, who stood defensively between him and the pensieve. It was the one place he felt he could escape to. He could live there without worrying about the state of Hogwarts or who's trial he would have to attend. They wanted to take it from him?

"Why?"

"She's concerned. You're spending too much time away from reality."

"Why _you_?" Ron merely shrugged.

"She probably figures I'm angry enough at you to physically stop you if it comes to it. I may actually like that a bit, to be honest." Ron said, half joking as he granted Harry mock access to the basin, prepared to jump him the moment he took a step towards it.

"You guys can't stop me from using the pensieve. Those are my _parents,_"Harry began, anger flaring.

"Just for one night. Go without it." Ron tried to clarify.

"And do what? Hang out with you and Hermione?" he spat back, anger not settling down.

"Don't really care what you do at the moment," Ron replied airily, "Why don't you hang out with your dear friend Malfoy?"

"Oh, come off it!" Harry shouted, "I'm not going to send someone to Azkaban-" he started, before waving his friend off, "You know what? Forget it, I've explained this a million times, if you don't get it by now there's no point."

"Good."

"Good."

"Fine."

"Fine."

Harry was not exactly sure what it was that made him do it. It could have been the argument they'd been having for days over, of all people, Draco Malfoy, finally boiling over past the point of return. It could have been the fact that Ron was physically between himself and his pensive, the last vestiges of his parents. There was years of possible indiscretions that may have also just made him snap from abandoning him and Hermione in the forest to his snoring in the dorms year after year. It could have had nothing to do with Ron with the exception of his unfortunate proximity to Harry's rage.

For whatever reason, Harry's anger would not subside. It would not bury itself any longer to accommodate the situation. He didn't care how ridiculous it was or how, without wands he was probably outmatched by his friend. Harry launched himself towards Ron with the full intent of landing the first punch.

* * *

**Sorry it's kind of short and probably mostly filler since the next few are kind of dense with material on both sides- Harry and the Marauders. Comments? Suggestions? Review!**


	11. Chapter 11

**Thanks to everyone who has read and favorited and put on alert and to Love Among The Ruins and Black4minister for the reviews. Enjoy.**

* * *

In the relatively short period of time Harry had known of Grimmauld place it had never been particularly clean. No matter who was foolish enough to try and liberate the home from the grime and mess that had accumulated over the years left in neglect it was no use. Even Molly Weasley had reached her limit here.

Perhaps it was the passage of time that had made it so stubborn to cleanliness, or just the unwillingness of Kreacher to work fruitlessly. Whatever the case, it had always been naturally a wreck in Harry's eyes. So to see it in disarray was natural.

Still, there was a limit. A limit to how messy one place could become, unaided. Seeing it now, glass broken, drapes torn, papers strewn about, Harry felt almost a twinge of pride that he and Ron had made that much of an impact upon the house. Even the portrait of Sirius' mother had gone hoarse from screaming. To actually make Grimmauld Place messier had to be some sort of an accomplishment, one that made him smile.

It was then, unfortunately, that he remembered with a sting of pain his split lip, as it cracked open again. With a wince he surveyed the room once again, determined to keep feeling good about his accomplishment. Ron soon joined him, taking a seat beside him on the floor, and handed Harry some ice without a word.

Neither boy could say which one had just won the fight. Nor could they tell you why exactly it was they had stopped, though exhaustion may have most likely been the main culprit. On the bright side the fight had been somewhat freeing for the boys. Though words were few and far between, they had used them well, voicing concerns they didn't even know they had with one another.

"I don't blame you for Fred's death," Ron finally said after a long silence, responding to the claim Harry had made following a punch to Ron's gut, "No one blames you for anyone's death except you."

"I'm not still angry at you for leaving us," Harry responded to the accusation Ron had laid on him alongside a few punches of his own earlier.

"I may not like it, but I guess I can understand why you're pardoning Malfoy," Ron offered, most likely from hearing Harry's explanation through his gasping breaths from beneath Ron's headlock.

"I can understand why you're so upset and I promise he's not getting a free rise," Harry countered, much like he had earlier with his clever use of window curtains.

"I don't think you just did it to get more attention," A proclamation that had been made with shattered glass.

"I don't really think you would sell me out just to get some attention," One that countered with a broken table.

"You're not a useless tosser. You _do_ deserve Ginny."

"And you deserve Hermione."

"Sorry about that comment about your breath."

"And you're snoring."

"Your glasses."

"Your hair."

The pair was almost in a complete fit of laughter remembering all the insults they had slung at each other. Better yet, it almost seemed silly to have been fighting, as if all the reasons they had for fighting was not worth it. Now that everything was in the open though, it was as if they had never fought. Suddenly, they heard a gasp of shock and turned their attention to a recently arrived Hermione who was busy surveying the damage, not yet noticing the boys in their state.

"What on earth happ- Merlin! What happened to the two of you?" She demanded. The two just looked at each other and laughed.

"Nothing, 'Mione, we're fine."

"Was there and attack? Harry if someone's broken into-"

"No one broke in. Me and Ron just finally...talked about things." They giggled.

"Look at the state you two are in! Did you get in a fight?"

"It's fine, 'Mione. We're friends again and everything." Ron insisted.

"But-But you got in a fight..."

"And now we're fine."

After a moment she let out an exasperated cry, leaving the room to find potions to take care of the cuts and scrapes. All the while mumbling about the useless mystery that was boys and their insistence on duking it out to see who won. Ron and Harry continued to chuckle listening to her carry on about how they may as well have held a spitting contest or just whipped it out and measured, though their laughter was mostly due to Ron's misunderstanding, thinking she meant their wands.

"You've got meetings at the Ministry in the morning, Harry," she admonished as she healed his cuts. He was having trouble caring.

"And you!" She started on Ron upon finished with Harry, "What were you going to tell your parents?" She hissed.

"Ow! Bloody hell woman!" Ron responded after she somewhat harshly lifted his chin.

"Sorry." She said with some begrudging hesitation.

Following that she became surprisingly gentle with the boy who was causing her so much grief, Harry noticed. So much so, it appeared as if he was once again forgotten, as the two lived in their own little world for a moment. He didn't want to interrupt as their hands lingered on one another for a moment too long for friends. Though Harry could no longer call them just friends, he wasn't so sure they weren't still calling themselves just friends. As Ron mumbled thanks, ears pink, Harry cleared his throat and they snapped back to more appropriate positions for their supposed status.

"Ron," Harry said, deciding spur of the moment, "I want you to come with me. In the pensieve."

"Blimey, mate, really?" Ron asked, shocked.

"Yeah. This is the year I told you guys about. My dad and Snape and everything. Seeing it a third time alone would be a bit odd, I think maybe if you came along...fresh eyes and all that."

"Yeah, of course I will." Ron exclaimed.

"Hermione, no offense, but I think maybe it should be just Ron and me." Harry offered to his other friend.

"No, of course. I mean, I've never put you through a coffee table, why on earth would you want me along?" She replied, slightly put off.

"It's kind of a guy thing," Harry said.

"Of course it is." She replied huffily.

While he felt bad for not inviting her along, he did have his reasons. He knew if she did, she would see right through his plan. There were several reasons for bringing along Ron this time around. Him coming along would help cement their friendship again, sure, and having another person see the particular memory he was thinking of may help him find some good in his father's actions, but there was one other reason. All the bickering and fighting James and Lily went through, he could not help but see Ron and Hermione in them with each row. He could have insight into how James is feeling and maybe Ron will figure out what he needs to do with Hermione.

"I promise I- we'll make it up to you Hermione." Ron declared.

"No, male bonding is good, I suppose, particularly when it doesn't involve breaking glass." She replied, "But the two of you better clean this up soon." She warned, before hugging each goodbye and apparating off to meet with Ginny.

"Come on, then." Harry waved him to the kitchen, where the pensieve still stood.

"What, now?" Ron questioned.

"Why not?"

"I was supposed to keep you out for one night. Ginny is concerned..."

"She doesn't understand."

"She cares about you, mate."

"Hermione cares about you." Harry countered.

"Wha-what is that supposed to-" Ron started, flustered.

"You're having nightmares."

"It's nothing." Ron defended.

"So is this." Harry tried. Ron considered for this for a moment, his denial and Harry's.

"Ok. Let's go."

* * *

**Love Among The Ruins- Sorry, another chapter without the Marauders, but I know the next few will be inundated with memories- fifth year on is pretty heavy on the James and Lily. **

**Black4minister- It's all written...up here (imagine me pointing to my head feebly). I'm a chapter ahead as a buffer in case I don't have a chance to write I can post it and give myself another week, I would update more than once a week but I'm pretty busy with work, volunteering, school prep and planning a road trip now, but I write every chance I get.**

**Anyway- Comments? Suggestions? Review!**


	12. Chapter 12

**Sorry, a little late. Thanks to everyone reading and once again Love among the ruins and Black4minister for the reviews. You guys rock.**

* * *

Despite the dull of the drably decorated carts on the Hogwarts Express, usually only given color by the occasional spark from one's wand, James, Sirius, and Peter stood in awe of the beaming light before them. A light so brilliant, James had no choice but to smack Peter's hand away when he reached for it.

"It's magnificent," Sirius declared after sometime.

"Beautiful." Peter echoed.

"...It's just a prefect badge." Remus said dully, obviously unimpressed by the badge on his lapel.

"Remus, it's so much more than that!" James countered excitedly.

"And why is that?" Remus questioned.

"It's freedom!" Sirius shouted.

"Yeah, from now on we won't have to worry about uptight prefects taking away house points whenever we bring a little fun into the castle." James explained.

"I think maybe the point was for me to make sure you two _don't_ wreak havoc." Remus debated.

"Nah, that can't be it," Sirius waved off.

"Wonder what old Dumbledore was thinking, giving you it and not me." James said offhand, yet arrogantly.

"Aside from my marks being better than yours and no disciplinary actions on my records save when the two of you drag me into a mess? It is certainly a wonder." Remus sneered.

"Oi, calm down, Remus, it was a joke." James said defensively, putting his hands up in surrender.

"No," Remus said, suddenly slumping shoulders, "You may have a point. Maybe he only gave it to me because it would seem less suspicious, me out at all hours of the night because of my-"

"Don't start that business again, you deserve this. You're a great student and the professors all love you." James interrupted, "Speaking of which we have a surprise for you and you're-" Suddenly he bolted upright as someone entered their cabin, "Furry little problem." He shouted a little too loudly as he attempted to save Remus' secret.

"Remus," Lily Evans greeted pleasantly, not noticing James and his attempt at covertness, "I thought I might find you here, there's a prefect's meeting in a few minutes." She explained quickly, her own badge prominently displayed.

"Thank you, Lily. Just give me a few moments to gather my things and I'll be there."

As Remus gathered his things Lily made a point not to confront the other members of the cabin, even to exchange pleasantries. Sirius and Peter did not seem too bothered by it, instead busying themselves with a game of wizard's chess. James, however, would not take his eyes off the girl, as if daring her to look at him. After an agonizing moment of silence, she finally relented, letting her eyes scan over the boy for just a fraction of a second. It was obvious to Harry and Ron he considered this a victory, a smile crossing his features. He was not done.

"Well, I'm doing well, Sirius, Peter, how about you two?" James suddenly announced. Sirius looked at his friend as if he was mad.

"What are you on about, James?"

"Our friend, Evans here, I assumed she meant to ask how we were doing and just forgot. I figured I would help her along and answer. How are you two?" James explained, relieving no confusion, but upsetting Lily, as usual.

"Have you gone off you rocker, mate?" Sirius asked, legitimately confused.

"I'll just wait for you outside, Remus." Lily said quickly, before James could try to explain again.

"It doesn't hurt to be civil, Evans!" James shouted at her before the door slid shut. Remus gave him an icy glare before hurrying off behind her.

"No offense, but you're dad seems to be..." Ron said, turning to Harry as the scene dissolved.

"A massive git?" Harry supplied, "I've noticed."

In the boy's dormitories the pair watched as James and Sirius excitedly dragged Remus into their room, with little regard for the boy's arms. Behind them, Peter closed the door and cast a silencing charm. Harry couldn't help but become alert at the somewhat secretive actions of the boy he knew would grow up to betray his parents. By his side, Ron stiffened as well.

"I have rounds, guys, let's make this brief." Remus begged.

"We were interrupted before I could tell you our surprise on the train." James explained.

"You'll love this, I promise." Sirius vowed.

"Alright, well what is it?" Remus said, as intrigued as Ron and Harry.

Devilishly smiling, in the manner Harry remembered Sirius and James would before hex some student for daring to walk in their same path, they stood before Remus and slowly began to morph in features, Peter trading off between watching, impressed, and standing guard as his friends transfigured into a stag and black dog. Even Harry and Ron found themselves standing impressed, despite having seen transfiguration before, at the two young boys managing to get the difficult magic done. Even in stag form they could see the glint of pride and happiness in James' eyes.

"Merlin, you actually managed to do it." Remus said, shocked.

"I can do it too," Peter interjected, "Mine's not as good as theirs, though, and we needed a watch."

"This is possibly the stupidest, most wreckless thing you guys have ever done," announced Remus, "I can't believe you did this for me." He finished, touched as they transformed back to human form.

"Of course we did." Sirius said offhand.

"You're our mate." Peter added and James nodded.

At fifteen, they were far too manly in their opinions to hug at this moment, or cry at the touching sentiment this commitment meant to each other as friends. However there was a hesitant moment that hung between them that suggested maybe they would manage to keep their manliness despite the show of emotion. The moment passed, however, and Remus cleared his throat, rising from his bed.

"Well, I really must go on rounds now, Lily will be waiting." James scoffed at his comment.

"She your partner? I would have expected her to partner with Snape. No commitment to the house, that one." He retorted.

"Snape's not a prefect this year." Remus said knowingly, granting James a little piece of knowledge that would grant him some happiness, much like their gesture had him. Sure enough, a relieved smile played on James lips.

"Whatever," He replied, trying to play cool, "I'm not that concerned about what she does, anyway." The three other friends exchanged doubtful glances but said nothing.

"Right. Well you three please stay out of trouble at least for my first night on task," Remus begged.

"Aww, what are we supposed to do then?" Sirius asked.

"For starters you could start on how exactly a horse, dog and..."

"Rat." Remus supplied with a derogatory laugh as Peter's ears grew red.

"Rat, traipsing around the castle will look in any way _not _look suspicious." Remus said, closing the door on the three who were now considering a fairly large flaw in their supposedly ingenious plan as the scene changed.

"Potter!"

The familiar voice of McGonagall echoed through her class, shortly before it was due to start. It was the tone that Harry and Ron were fairly familiar to, and one that made them sweat just a little bit. It clearly had the same affect on James as he looked, slightly frightened towards Sirius and Remus, giving them a hesitant shrug that seemed to suggest he had no idea why he was in trouble this time.

"Yes, Professor?" He asked nervously.

"It seems that our captain has fallen ill and will be unable to play our next match against Ravenclaw." She explained. James' anxiety did not let up.

"What?! This is a disaster!" He exclaimed.

"We have our back up-"

"But he's _terrible_. We may as well have a brick-"

"Nonetheless, he will be taking over for the one game, but that leaves the captain position open temporarily..." Realizing what she was potentially suggesting, James' face cracked into a grin.

"Professor, are you asking me to take over?"

"Temporarily," She reiterated, "and this is solely based on you having the most experience and, frankly, talent on the team."

"Of course." He soberly replied, his face, however, unable to contain his happiness.

"Again, this is a temporary position, once Peakes recovers he will return to duty," She noticed the boy was hardly listening and added, "Do not let me rue the day I made this decision, Potter. I expect you to behave and act accordingly in your leadership position. If I even suspect your thinking of pulling a silly stunt you will lose the position and my favor in considering you captain for next season," This got his attention, "After this year we will need a new captain, after all."

Sirius slapped his friend's back proudly as the professor began class again. The hopes of her getting any of her lesson through to James was clearly gone as he sat with a dazed, happy expression on his face, occasionally writing notes on what to do at the next team practice.

It was then back in the common room, Gryffindor colors proudly on display alongside butterbeer and a banquet of food that Harry and Ron next found themselves. A chorus of applause filled the room as James entered the room, surrounded by the rest of the team, clearly victorious over Ravenclaw. Soon Sirius, Remus, and Peter joined him by his side with rousing congratulations.

He quickly began to move about the room with the swagger of a man who knew he was a star. Keenly aware of the girls giggling to each other, glancing every so often at him before whispering to each other. He was eating it up. Soon, he narrowed his sights onto Lily. He sauntered up to her and her friends, confidence not an issue, despite the group of girls.

"Evans," He said, "I thought I would give you the chance to dance with the future captain of the Gryffindor Quidditch team and maybe a trip to Hogsmeade later," Smugly offering his hand. She looked at it without interest.

"No." She said simply.

"No? No to what?" He asked, feigning shock.

"No to everything. Hogsmeade, the dance, even the notion that McGonagall would be naïve enough to make you captain." She rattled off.

"She did it once before..." He argued, taking offense that he couldn't be captain, "and look what happens." He finished, giving a grandiose gesture to the room and party.

"She warned you not to misbehave."

"And I was perfectly nice. Not once did I hex _Sev._" He countered.

"She just didn't catch you." She countered, " I did, however, notice Hutchins walking around with boils on his face. What did he do to you? Smile?" Without a comeback, James merely narrowed his eyes.

"A simple no would suffice," He tried.

"Apparently not, or you would have gone away when I gave you one." She countered.

"Mate, quit while you're... ridiculously far behind." Sirius offered, trying to get James away from Lily. His eyes lingered on her a little longer before turning and giving Sirius a wide smile.

"How about we go ask those fine young girls for a dance?" He said, pointing at a more willing group of girls.

As the two made their way to the adoring fans, Harry noticed a rather disgusted look on Ron's face. It was, however, more than that, Harry knew. The look of disgust was also for himself, as Harry was sure Ron was recalling the way he had acted somewhat similarly towards Hermione after winning a match sixth year. It was a big reason he began dating Lavender that year.

He was happy to see his plan get to Ron to see the common parallels between his parents and Ron and Hermione with their constant bickering and wasted time. Curiously, he noticed his mother. Previously she had been talking with her friends before James interrupted. Now, however, she seemed preoccupied, rarely putting a word into the conversation. Instead, her eyes lingered every now and then, to James and the random girl he was dancing with. She had an expression Harry could not read, but was one of far too much interest for someone who had just rejected the boy she was now watching.

The memory faded and in its place Remus and Lily walked the darkened halls of Hogwarts, patrolling. Harry noticed for the first time Lily did not seem perturbed or annoyed, in fact she looked happy. It was a sight he was not used to outside the presence of Snape and a part of him was happy to see his professor was not the sole person who could bring a smile to her face.

"Remus, you look a little tired. Should we head back?" She offered.

"No, thanks. I'm fine, I promise." Remus said evasively. She continued to exam him, concerned.

"You know, come to think of it, you always appear a bit tired." She commented.

"Light sleeper, I guess." He mumbled.

"Sev has this ridiculous notion that..." She started, and Remus stiffened, knowing full well Severus had his suspicions, "Well nevermind, it's silly. I'm sure it has more to do with your roommates than something so unlikely. It must be a nightmare." Remus relaxed as she waved off the theory.

"They're not all bad." Remus said, defending his friends.

Lily paused for a moment, as if thinking over his comment. It looked as if she was formulating and argument to Harry until he noticed off in the distance some students wearing a familiar silver and green robes. Though it was not clear who exactly these students were to Harry, it was clear Lily did. Two or three of the students were approximately the same age as Lily and Remus, he could tell, and one stood taller than the rest, obviously a seventh year student.

He stood with the others gathered around him, showing them something that, from their position, neither Remus nor Lily could see, with pride, whispering words with a smile to the enraptured audience he had. Upon noticing the two prefect the older boy immediately concealed his exposed arm with his sleeve, alerting the others to outside presence.

Outnumbered, the best they would be able to do is disband them and tell them to get inside their common room, which Remus quickly insisted they do. As they grumbled foul words for the Gryffindors, Lily hardly noticed. Her attention, as well as Harry's, was fixed on the small first year boy, barely eleven, who had stood and listened to the older boy's words.

"Dark mark?" Ron asked, breaking Harry from his reverie. He could only nod.

"Evans." One of the Slytherins her age greeted curtly, "I'll send Severus your regards." He said coldly, smiling before disappearing into the dungeon in a way that made Harry wish he could use his wand on him. On his side he noticed Ron had even pulled out his wand, fist balling tightly around it.

"You're right, Remus," Lily said as they continued their patrol, leaving behind the Slytherins, "I suppose there are far worse friends to have."

* * *

**Sorry for the delay, but since fifth year has been broken up into several chapters, I will probably post another chapter in a few days.**

**Comments? Suggestions? Review!**


	13. Chapter 13

**I'm going to go ahead and stop trying to set a deadline to update because clearly my life has been set up to sabatoge me. I apologize again for the delay but thanks to everyone who's reading, favorting, putting on alert and to Black4minister for the review.**

* * *

"Lily!" Remus shouted, now in broad daylight by the lake, huffing and puffing to catch up to where Lily, Harry, and Ron stood.

"Hello, Remus." She greeted and slowed her pace slightly, but did not stop completely.

"The Headmaster had to revise the scheduled rounds for next month, we're going to be switching with the sixth year Hufflepuffs." Remus explained.

"Oh? That's a bit odd. Dumbledore has been switching us around almost every month." She replied, baiting Remus somewhat for an explanation, though he gave her none.

"Lily," Another voice greeted, saving Remus his stuttering through another excuse. He was probably as pleased as Harry and Ron to see Severus Snape standing beside him, "Lupin," He added curtly.

"Sev, Hi. Remus was just giving me the revised prefect schedule for the month." Lily explained.

"Another modification?" Severus said suspiciously, eying the paper in Lupin's hand. The boy was not prepared to hand it over.

"Yes, we're going to switch over to the week of the tenth and- Oh!" She interrupted herself, realizing, "Sev I'm sorry, I guess I won't be able to help you with that Potions essay on those nights. I'm so sorry." She said regretfully. Ron snorted beside Harry.

"Snape needing help in _potions_?"

"Unlikely." Harry agreed.

"More like he needs help trying to snog-" Ron stopped, realizing who he was talking about, and to whom, "Sorry mate." Harry just glared at his friend.

"So that leaves the week of the eighteenth open then?" Snape said dubiously.

"I guess," Remus replied, non committed.

"Shame," Snape said, trying to act more nonchalant than he could ever be, "It would have been such a lovely night to be walking around the castle. Full moon that week and all."

"Well, the essay's due before then, but maybe we can do something else that week?" Lily asked Snape, though his eyes were on Remus, barely acknowledging her existence.

"We don't really dictate what week we're scheduled, Severus," Remus said in a attempt at a civil tongue, "Regardless of what moon we may enjoy that night."

Up until that point Lily had remained, or was at least acting like she was, unaware of the uncomfortable situation in front of her. The two boys, however, did not waiver in their stare down. Looking between the two, Lily seemed confused, unsure of how to proceed. Even Harry was unsure of what exactly was making the two confront each other so boldly. Neither were particularly outgoing int school, he had learned. There was the obvious accusation in the air, but there were other things thickly electrifying the atmosphere. Remus' friends, Snape's alliances, and Lily, who finally moved.

"Thank you, Remus, for letting me know. I'll see you later?" She said, he nodded and backed away.

"I have to go too, Lily," Snape said, shocking her, "Mcnair asked me to accompany him to-"

"Mcnair?" She asked, not wanting to even hear where they were going.

"Yes. He's in our year, Slyherin-"

"I know who he is Sev, why are you hanging out with him?"

"He's my friend." Severus replied defensively, "You don't hear me complaining about your hanging around with Remus."

"He doesn't talk about being a death eater like it's some noble thing to aspire to." She said hotly.

"He's friends with Potter, that insufferable git!" He once again countered.

"Potter's not trying to _murder_ people."

Severus contorted at the even the slightest defense of James. Snape mumbled something under his breathe Harry could barely hear regarding James Potter and where he could stick his quidditch broom. He remembered a similar argument the two had from Snape's memories. With a slight sadness Harry could see their friendship was stalling, stuck now in their opinions- Snape unable to give up his obsession with dark arts and Lily unable to accept it- the two could go no further together. He knew what was coming, the dissolution of their friendship over exactly this, but he still could not help but feel sorry for both, who tried so hard to remain friends.

"I have to go." Snape said abruptly, leaving Lily fuming and Remus just a few meters away, eavesdropping with concerns of his own.

All of a sudden Harry felt out of sorts as the memories switched one after another so quickly, he and Ron barely had time to register where they were in the castle. First they watched Lily hurry to class, almost late, with James and Sirius lagging behind, obviously uninterested in making it on time. She suddenly dropped some notes from their last class. Stopping to pick them up, all parties were surprised to find James wordlessly helping pick up the notes and hand them to her without a word. She could find no words either.

With a jerk they were switched again with rapid pace. With added confusion Harry watched his father open doors for Lily, hand her things without witty retort, nothing to infuriate her. In fact, the opposite. He was infuriating someone, though, as always on the scene was Severus, carefully watching with disgust as James attempted to please Lily.

Finally, they stopped their dizzying switch from scene to scene, ending with neither his mother or his father, but Remus and Severus. Severus had Remus cornered late at night, no doubt on the night he was not supposed to be on prefect duties but rather spending an evening in the Shrieking Shack. Though cornered, Lupin was not exactly one to take things lying down.

"If you recall, Severus, one of us is authorized to be out this late, and it isn't you." Snape scoffed at him.

"What, in the middle of rounds then?" He drawled, "I don't think so. In fact I think you were somewhere else."

"And how on earth-"

"Stow it, Lupin. I know there's something off about you. Something you don't want others to find out. I'm going to find out and I'm going to make sure everyone knows." He threatened.

He was obviously angry, Harry knew, but he did not know why. He suspected Remus did not either. It was clear, though, that it was not Remus he was angry at. He was willing to bet that his father had done something to him earlier that night to make him threaten Remus. Perhaps it was James' attempts to change that angered him, Harry thought. Maybe he was realizing that their affections for Lily were equal, and so were their chances now that James was willing to change for her when he wasn't.

The scene dissolved and they were back in the boy's dormitories, Lupin pacing the floor while James was reading, sprawled across his bed. Sirius lay on his own bed without a book as Peter fiddled with some exploding snaps. All three obviously not as concerned as Remus over what he had just said.

"Why aren't you three panicking?" He finally asked.

"Because it's _Snape_," Sirius explained coolly, "He's an idiot. Besides, there's no proof."

"But-"

"Don't worry, Remus," interjected James, "We can always take care of him if he gets too close." He suggested with a smile.

"No." Remus responded firmly, "I don't care how much you two hate him. Leave. Him. Alone. No more pranking him in the halls for the hell of it. Hopefully if we stay out of his hair he'll drop it."

"Merlin help us if we _do_ get in that greasy mess." Sirius shuddered, James roared with laughter.

"This is no laughing matter, please, leave him alone." Remus begged.

"Alright, alright," James said with a sigh, "I'm too busy with Quidditch right now to care anyway."

"Yeah," Sirius added, "And I'm finding that hexing Peter here is just as fun."

"Hey!"

The promise, Harry knew, was sure to be broken and soon. James and Sirius had hated Snape since day one, and he knew they would not be able to refrain from torturing the boy for too long. Motives may have changed over the years- with James it was hating his dark magic obsession and, to a less admitted but greater degree his relationship with Lily and with Sirius it was more his continued insistence on living- but Severus Snape never ceased to be their number one target for hijinks.

It was, admittedly, with some shock, then, that the next memory that formed for the pair was not the breaking of that promise to Remus, but rather a calm night in the Gryffindor common room. Huddled in separate corners were James and Lily. Each sat with their respective Gryffindor friends, working, Harry had to assume when recalling the difficult fifth year load of assignments, on essays or other work due in the near future. Quiet, respectful whispers were all that could be heard in the room. At least, until the portrait door swung open.

"I found another one!" Shouted an excited Peter Pettigrew, earning scornful looks not only from th rest of the Gryffindors, but his friends as well.

"Alright, keep your knickers on." Sirius whispered loudly to the boy, who turned red with his raucous entry.

"Sorry," He said as he sat himself with his friends, "But I've just found another passage-"

"Keep it down!" This time Remus hushed the boy, "Just put it on the thing." He urged, shuffling some papers Peter's way.

Curious, Harry took a glance at the sheets, but could not identify what it may have been. He was about to assume it was another assignment of sorts until he heard Ron snort in amusement beside him. He looked to his friend.

"The map." Ron supplied and it hit Harry. They were creating the Marauder's Map! Excitement struck him as he watched Peter draw onto the simple piece of parchment that had given him quite the advantage during his own time at school.

Despite their chastising of Peter for his volume, the group was absolutely giddy as they watched the map being given more detail. Harry noticed it was not nearly complete, there were no moving dots for professors and judging by the way they protected it, the map was likely not charmed to respond to their choice words, but nonetheless it was impressive. Their detailed map would be an advantage, even in its preliminary form.

It was because of this buzzing, however, that Lily Evans chose to come over. It was now very public knowledge that she did not care for James Potter and his friends. The whole room tensed as she moved from her seat and in their direction. The uncomfortable glances she received made it also well known that despite her dislike, most people were generally in favor of their quidditch star getting a little extra tolerance as far as noise. Either that, or they had attempted the same and found themselves hexed. Still, she stood before them.

"Boys," She said, almost bored, "Would you please keep it down? Some of us are trying to study."

They all sat in silence for a moment, as if gaging the girl. Like they had never met her before. In fact, closer observation by Harry made it more clear- Remus was silent because of his allegiance to both sides, Peter out of pure fear, Sirius out of indignation. It was his father, however, who was unreadable. He waited for the explosion, and was a bit surprised to find Sirius to be the one up for a row.

"Evans-"

"Sorry," James suddenly cut in, "We'll try and keep it down."

With that he lifted a random book to his onto his lap and began to read with little care as to what just happened. Remus switched from remaining neutral to a look of confusion that matched Lily's. Peter still looked terrified, trying to act casual despite the fact that Sirius had stuffed their work down his sweater upon seeing the approaching girl, and Sirius looked as if he had been betrayed by his friend.

"Th-Thank you." She replied out of sorts before leaving the boys to their business.

Truthfully Harry was feeling the same as his mother, as did Ron, it appeared. He seemed more deep in thought, however, than Harry on the matter. His thoughts merely revolved around _What the bloody hell is going on_. Ron's were somewhat more deep, surprisingly enough. Furrowed brow kept to himself as the memory shifted, Harry became somewhat annoyed. It was, after all, his father Ron was thinking about, he had a right to know what he thought of the situation. It was part of why he asked them here.

"Mind sharing what you're thinking?" Harry finally asked, breaking his friend's reverie.

"Huh? Oh, just about your dad."

"Yeah, what was that all about? He's been a right git to my mum for four years, all of a sudden he's polite?"

"Well..." Ron ruminated, "It's not too hard to believe."

"Why not?"

"He's been trying to have it away with your mum since day one-"

"Pleasant wording as always, Ron."

"Anyway, all the stuff he usually pulls on girls isn't working, so he's trying a different tact." Ron explained.

"So you think he's just acting nice to impress her?"

"Well, yeah. That's what we do isn't it? Try to impress them?" Ron turned a bit red as he explained, no doubt remembering his own attempts at wooing Hermione with the help of a book.

"You think it will work?'' Harry asked.

"Depends on if he's just acting nice to get her to fancy him back. If it's legitimate, then I guess you have your answer about how your parents got together. If he's not doing this for real, your mum's a smart girl, she'll see through it. Probably hate him even more for it. There's no point acting like something you aren't. She can only like what's really there"

Harry stared at Ron, slightly shocked at his insight. He made a mental note to read that damned book of his. A more immediate concern for him was what was the next memory, though. There was still at least one coming he knew showed James as a far from polite young man. Which would mean he was in fact acting around Lily and she had seen through it. As the next memory formed Harry began to worry.

* * *

**So yeah, again, sorry but I keep adding to this year and next year since I'm almost completely finished with the story- so much so that fifth year might have to be divided into four chapters...we'll see since I just keep lying to you guys I guess.**

**Anyway comments? Suggestions? Review!**


	14. Chapter 14

**Sigh, once again a bit late, but once again fifth year has been extended a bit. Thanks to everyone who's read, alerted, favorited and once again to Black4minister and Love Among The Ruins. You guys rock.**

**Enjoy.**

* * *

"What in _Merlin_ was that?!" Sirius' voice greeted Harry and Ron in the next memory, appearing to be isolated in the boy's dorm with James alone.

"What are you on about?" James asked, slightly annoyed.

"You know bloody well what I'm talking about. Why have you been acting strange lately? Paying attention in class? Arriving on time? Where's _my _James?" Sirius asked.

James appeared to be ruminating on something as he reached for the book they had apparently gone to get in the first place. Harry was so distracted by the look on his father's face, trying to determine if he was about to lie to his friend or legitimately confess something, he did not notice the same thing Ron had. From beneath the book he had picked up, a piece of parchment fell to the floor.

"Maybe I'm keeping a low profile. Just like Remus asked, remember?" James offered in response, moving to exit.

"Bollucks. You never listen to Remus. This is something else, isn't it?"

"I don't know what you're on about but we're late to charms..."

"With Lily!" Sirius suddenly exclaimed.

"What?" James asked, annoyed further.

"You're doing this because of Evans, aren't you?" Sirius said with a chuckle, "Acting like a goody good so you can get her to fancy you?"

"Shut it." James said, leaving the room to raucous laughter from Sirius.

"Oh, come on, mate, I'm just teasing." Sirius tried.

"I never said that's- maybe I just decided to grow up a bit. Unlike some people." James snapped.

"Lighten up, James. I just don't see why we can't still have a little fun. When she's not looking. Best of both worlds." James just groaned in annoyance, "Don't you dare try and say she isn't why-"

Sirius stopped short outside of the portrait hole, just behind James, who had exited before him. Harry stood just just beside his father, following his line of sight. He was distracted for a moment by Ron, who had just appeared, slightly winded, behind Sirius, but continued to look forward to where James was witnessing yet another row between Lily and Severus.

Tones were hushed, barely audible, and the duo hardly seemed aware that others were around. James appeared conflicted for a moment, trying to decide if he should continue walking forward or stop and listen. In his hesitation, he was making himself rather obvious. Still, the pair did not notice. They could only hear snippets of conversation, but Harry could not move. For some reason, he remained at his father's side.

"-On, Sev, this is ridiculous-"

"- Trust me, Lily, I know I'm ri-"

"- Being paranoid-"

"-Like you?...Friends automatically...death...hypocritical?"

It did not take hearing every word to know Lily became upset at what he was saying, and with a huff stormed off. James took one quick glance at Sirius and appeared to have a silent conversation with him before tearing off in the opposite direction as Lily and the contrite Severus, despite having next class with her in a few moments. Sirius followed, as did a surprised Harry and Ron.

Quickly they surmised what was happening, as James suddenly stopped at a random portrait and whispered something. Suddenly it swung out to reveal a passage Harry had never previously seen before. In moments they were in front of charms, watching Lily try to ignore Severus all down the hall. James stood in front of the door, looking foolishly like a person trying to be casual. Lily noticed him up ahead and her eyes flashed with a mix of panic and annoyance.

"This guy bothering you, Evans?" James asked, chest puffed out slightly. Severus paused for a moment, sensing he was outnumbered with Sirius there, he tugged on his sleeve, trying to find his wand.

"Not as much as you, Potter." She said in a huff.

James deflated a bit, somewhat shocked that she wasn't accepting his help to avoid Snape. Even Snape looked a bit surprised, yet mostly pleased, at her slight. More shocked than both was Harry when suddenly, Lily turned to Snape and gave him a quick hug goodbye before entering the class, suggesting they talk later at lunch. It was Snape's turn to puff his chest out a bit as he walked away. Lily did not look at James as she passed by him into the class, but one could not ignore the seething look burning into her from Sirius.

"What's going on?" Harry asked, though not particularly to Ron, but rather himself.

"I'm confused." Ron admitted as well.

Harry rubbed his eyes, frustrated. He was nowhere near seeing any sort of interest in Lily develop for his father. He was beginning to suspect that Sirius was right, too. It was an act he was putting on just for her. She must be seeing right through it.

When he opened his eyes again it was night. He could not recognize which one exactly, but he knew he was in the halls somewhere in Hogwarts. Three silhouettes stood ahead of him. One, judging but the height, was Ron. As he approached he made out the figures of Sirius and Snape.

"Weird pairing, eh?" Ron joked.

"Trust me, they're not about to swap love potions." Harry reassured.

They watched as Snape cornered Sirius far too easily, in Harry's opinion. This opinion was only solidified by the maniacal smile that was plastered on Sirius' face. Behind him Harry noticed they were beside one of the passageways outside. If memory served him correctly it was one he had used before to get very close to the whomping willow.

"Just because one of your insufferable mates is a prefect doesn't mean you can go frolicking about the castle after hours." Snape chastised.

"Oh lay off, you're out late too. Besides," He added rather devilishly, "I wasn't in the castle." Snape's eyes widened slightly.

"What are you talking about?"

"You've been here as long as I have. Don't tell me you haven't learned all the secret passages yet?" Sirius taunted, "Merlin, even a second year would know about them."

As if to prove his point, he veered out of the way to reveal the passage he had just entered from. He waved at it, as if to tempt Snape to enter. Harry knew what was coming next, he was just a bit surprised to have learned the reason why. By the looks of it, Sirius wasn't trying to have a laugh sending Snape to meet Remus during a full moon, but rather seemed to be doing it for James. Harry was sure he saw the crestfallen look on James when he tried to defend Lily from Snape.

As he listened to Sirius subtlety offer Snape the chance to prove he was right about Remus, 'accidentally' teaching how to pass the whomping willow, Harry was still struck by the motives of both boys. He wasn't sure Severus was motivated by anything other than hate for James and anyone associated with him. Sirius, on the other hand, seemed to be doing this out of concern for his friend, however misguided. He could see now why Lily's fears were not unwarranted about the influence of Snape's Death Eater friends.

"I guess you're right, _Sev_, I should really head back to my room," Sirius casually offered to the now distracted boy, "Now if only I could find Remus," He pondered, before shrugging it off, "I'm sure he's around here somewhere. It's not like he's at the Shrieking Shack or anything. That would just be silly." He finished, slapping Snape hard on the back and walking off, sure enough information was planted.

Quickly, they moved into the boy's dorm, once again alone with James and Sirius. Judging by the satisfied look on his face, Sirius had just told James what he had done with Snape. Judging by the look on James' face, he was far from pleased.

"Are you _insane_?!" He asked, shocked.

"What? What's the big deal? We scare the daylights out of Snivellous and he never bothers us again." Sirius explained, slightly put out that James was upset.

"What about what Remus said about leaving the greasy git alone?"

"Now he won't have to worry. No one'll believe him anyway."

"Did you even stop to think about what would happen when Snape runs into Remus?" James asked. Sirius thought for a moment, but then shrugged it off.

"Yeah, he growls a bit, Snape wets himself, we all have a merry good time mocking him about it."

"No, you idiot. He will not just _growl_ at him. He will kill him." James whispered through gritted teeth.

"I think you're being a little extreme. It's Remus-"

"No. It's not Remus It's a feral, dangerous, deadly werewol-" James paused mid outburst, trying to contain himself, "I have to go stop this." He sighed before rushing out, leaving Sirius pondering.

"Wow." Harry muttered.

"What?" Ron asked, still taken aback from what he saw Sirius do.

"Sirius. Doing that for my dad." Harry explained.

"Hardly seems like a favor. Could've gotten them in a lot of trouble." Ron debated.

"But I can see he was just trying to help. Dad was upset about Snape and my mum, I think Sirius was just trying to help get revenge." He reasoned.

"Hmm," Ron thought, "well I can honestly say without a doubt, if it came to it, I would gladly sic a werewolf on Malfoy for you."

"Thanks," Harry chuckled, "You're a true friend."

While he knew he could never see what really happened when his father went out to find Snape that night, Harry was still slightly disappointed to find himself in class the next morning instead of in the action the night before. Instead, he sat beside a bedraggled Remus and James, the occasional person coming up confirm what they had heard about the night before. Neither boy spoke of it, but rather Sirius, apparently not learning any particular lesson from the night, who regaled others with the harrowing tale as James stared at him angrily.

"Should I be concerned?" Remus asked, pulling James aside.

"No, you'll be fine. Snape's too embarrassed to admit I saved him last night. He won't be telling anyone. Besides, he didn't get far enough to see you." James assured Remus, who sighed with relief.

"Is it true?" Lily's voice suddenly lifted from the crowd. James glanced at her frazzled state, eyes narrowing. "I heard Sev was attacked by something" Her eyes involuntarily flickered to Remus, then back to her friend, "and h-he saved him."

"Oi, Evans, you could just ask me yourself." James sneered. She looked at him with a blush creeping onto her cheeks before excusing herself from the room.

The look on James' face for once was one of disgust for the girl Harry had an inkling his father's attempts to be civil towards her would be over now, and he would resume his other methods of attracting her attention.

Sadly, Harry's assumption was correct. Though not fully reverted to his old ways, Harry noticed, James made a point to wreak havoc, but only when Lily was around. It was as if he was trying to contradict himself at every turn just to confuse Harry. While Sirius seemed not to notice, and only enjoy being his partner in crime, there were memories Harry noted as Remus'- usually when Sirius was either not around or busy elsewhere, that Harry watched his father maintain his more mature attitude. Now it just seemed as if he was using bad behavior to anger Lily on purpose.

"This is ridiculous," Harry exclaimed as they shifted, "First he tries to impress her by acting mature and now he's intentionally acting like and arse in front of her." He ranted.

"I don't think he's acting." Ron murmured, slightly cautious because of Harry's tone. His friend did not hear him, though, because the next thing he knew, they were beside a lake. James was playing with a snitch and Severus Snape was walking his way.

* * *

**Well then, here we are. Again, sorry for the delay. I could say it was because I watched my first Harry Potter film this week (decent, but are they always so feel so rushed, even for two and a half hours?) and because once again I've extended this year but I hate excuses, so my bad.**

**Anyway- comments? Suggestions? Review!**


	15. Chapter 15

**Oh my goodness, I'm updating before a week has passed! Yay copious amounts of work for the next few days that will make it difficult to post anytime after now which makes now a perfect time to do so!**

**As always, thanks to everyone who's reading, favoriting, putting on alert, and of course Black4minister and Love Among The Ruins for the reviews.**

* * *

Witnessing the same memory for the third time was slightly odd for Harry. Not that he hadn't recounted memories before, playing them over and over in his head to remember some emotion or important fact, it was just rather odd to repeatedly see something he was never meant to in the first place. Now by his side Ron watched for the first time, enthralled at the events taking place and yet Harry felt...nothing.

No longer was there the hatred for his father, though he still didn't agree with what he did, or the sympathy for Snape, or the indignation and sadness for his mother when she heard the words come from her best friends mouth. It felt oddly...typical. Of course James hexed Snape, it was what he did. Of course Lily defended Snape, it was what she did. Of course Snape snapped angrily at some bystander, it was what he did. This time, it just happened to be Lily. This time, it just happened to cause more damage than usual.

Instead of watching James taunt the boy and Snape snap at Lily's help, Harry watched Ron for his reactions. It was the first time he was seeing this, after all, perhaps he would be able to give him information he didn't have already. Ron seemed inclined to agree with Harry now. With the whole picture of their years in school, even Ron's only seeing fifth year, it just seemed like another argument among the group, hardly noteworthy until, of course, Snape called her a 'mudblood'. Harry saw Ron tense with the word. He didn't even let the memory continue playing out.

"So that's it then?" Ron asked.

"What?"

"Snape and your mum?" He clarified. Harry nodded.

"He tried to apologize-"

"But she won't accept it. He crossed a line there."

"You're right. As far as I know they stopped speaking after today." Harry confirmed, "But it seems a bit...harsh, don't you think? She was friends with him even though he associated with people like Mulciber and Avery and other Death Eaters. She must have known it may come to this."

"It's different. Has he ever called her that before? I doubt it. Even if he really thought that about muggleborns, he never treated _her_ like that." Ron argued, "Now even she- his best friend- is a lower person. He chose his side just then and she chose hers. Not much to say to each other after that."

Turning back to the scene before them, they noticed they were now in the Gryffindor common room. Sirius and James sat by the fire. Though Lily was nowhere to be found, her voice was the only sound in the room. Punctuated silences, Harry knew, were the moments Snape was using to try to apologize. He knew full well what was going on just outside the portrait door. The dissolution of a friendship.

Harry remembered the contemptuous look on her face when she had left Snape standing alone outside of the Gryffindor common room. He did not, however, remember the crushed look of someone on the verge of tears he was greeted with upon her re-entrance into the room. James noticed as well, apparently, as he rose to confront her somehow, not heeding Sirius' attempts to get him to sit back down.

"Evans!" He shouted, before revising, "L-Lily," in a normal tone as he was beside her, "I want to apologize."

"Apologize." She said flatly, not quite questioning nor was it particularly welcoming. Her face was unreadable.

"About Snape," He clarified. Her features flickered at the boy's name, though still remained a mystery to Harry, "I'm sorry he's such a git. He never should have said that-" Beside him, Ron smacked his forehead. Harry let out a groan for his father, who was either too proud or stupid to suck it up and apologize for his own behavior.

"You really must be as stupid as I thought." Was Lily's only response before leaving the boy standing, confused, by the stairs to the girl's dormitories. He turned back to Sirius, who just shrugged in exasperation. "Just leave me alone from now on, Potter." She flung behind herself, too tired to argue.

Harry sighed in frustration, once again no closer to finding out exactly what it was his parents even saw in each other. They hardly seemed to be getting closer through the years. He could not see any reason for their union. Ron, on the other hand, chuckled out loud. Harry's head snapped to his side, slightly put off by his friend's amusement.

"Is something funny?" He asked.

"What?" Ron sobered a bit, "Oh, no, it's nothing. This is great. I mean you're getting your answers, right?"

"No. I'm not!" Harry exclaimed, flabbergasted, "I still don't see them being able to hold a conversation much less have a future and, well, me."

"Mate, it's all a game." Ron said, attempting to sound sage, but succeeding in just confusing Harry more.

"A game?" Harry asked, begging for clarification.

"Yeah." Ron did not provide one. Awkward silence ensued.

"Merlin, Ron, I cannot read your mind!" Exclaimed Harry.

"This whole time your dad's been acting like an arse to make sure your mum doesn't know that he really does fancy her and your mum's been acting like she hates him because she has to so he doesn't know she fancies him."

He explained it as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. Harry looked at him in amazement. He found it hard to believe people would really act like that just to avoid being honest with someone...then he remembered who he was talking to Of course Ron would be able to see it, he'd been doing the same thing for going on eight years.

"I can't believe it." Harry said, astonished.

"Come off it, just because you and Ginny had it easy doesn't mean the rest of us don't have to play along before, well, you know. I'm glad to be done with it, that's for sure."

Harry marveled at Ron's suggestion. It made some sense. They were just hiding their true feelings in case they were going to get hurt. Because they were hiding it, though, both thought the other hated them. It was an impossibly stupid method of getting feelings across, but then again, he had to look at Ron and Hermione. They had hated each other at first too and now...hold on a moment.

"Wait, what? Done with it? Does that mean you and Hermione are..." Harry asked, suddenly realizing what Ron has said.

"Well...yeah." Ron said, rubbing his neck, trying to keep the blood from rushing to his face.

"When did this happen?" Harry asked, somewhat excited for his friends and the hope their similar relationship had with his parents.

"What are you talking about, you were there." Ron proclaimed.

"Wait, the kiss? That's it?" Harry asked, somewhat doubtful.

"Well, yeah, that'd be when it started."

"Oh, so you two have kissed since then."

"Well no. Figured it was not really appropriate, considering." Ron made a gesture that seemed to indicate it wasn't appropriate to kiss his girlfriend because the entire world wouldn't like it.

"But you've _talked_ about it, right?" Harry asked, somewhat desperately.

"Well, I guess not formally." Ron said, nervous now.

"What do you mean by not formally?"

"Well, I haven't called my girlfriend. I don't think she's ever called me her boyfriend. We just, hang out. Together."

Without kissing. Or acknowledging on another as something other than a friend. Or talking about the possibility of actually being more than friends. All of these statements ran through Harry's mind as he considered whether or not Ron was right in thinking he was now officially together with Hermione.

"Are you sure you two are actually together, mate?" Harry asked, a panicked look streaked across Ron's face.

"Well now I'm not sure!" He exclaimed, "I thought...I-I mean we kissed...that should be enough shouldn't it?!"

Ron was in full panic mode and Harry could not help but be a bit amused at the blunder. For weeks he could tell Hermione was a bit frustrated with Ron and the lack of definition for their relationship. He had seen her look at him longingly, and angrily, almost trying to telepathically tell him to make a bloody move already. It tickled him some measure to see she was only frustrated because Ron had just assumed they were together after one kiss. After all, it made some sense, Harry considered. His last relationship had started in exactly the same manner. He decided, however, not to bring up the many errors of Ron's relationship with Lavender, particularly since he appeared to desperately need a calming drought.

"Blimey, she doesn't know, does she?" He asked Harry, frightened, "She thinks I'm just acting like a git again, right? Or that I hate her, or don't want to be with her... this is bad, Harry, really bad."

"Well..." Harry attempted to find some silver lining, Ron looked hopefully to him, but he could come up with none. Ron was right. He was kind of screwed.

"I have to go." Ron declared, desperate to find Hermione.

"You want some help?" Harry offered, though a little reluctantly, preferring to stay where he was, right by the pensieve.

But Ron was not paying much attention, rather muttering to himself about his rather massive miscommunication with Hermione and how he would possibly be able to rectify it. Harry, despite not wanting to leave quite yet, knew his help would probably be needed if Ron was going to manage not to make the situation worse. So with a sigh and a longing look, he left the pensive and followed Ron back to the Burrow where his not-girlfriend waited.

* * *

**Black4minister- Thanks for the review, that's kind of what I figured with Sirius, he's not malicious, he probably would have been doing it for James. Also, the note will be addressed next chapter, it's fairly important for sixth year on with James, Sirius, and Lily. Glad to know I'm not crazy about the movies lol.**

**Love Among The Ruins- Thanks for the review and your view on the Sirius angle. The middle was meant to be a bit confusing, but hopefully not too bad. Most of that will be revealed next chapter on.**

**Also, the whole Ron thing tickled me at the end, and I was thinking about writing kind of a side story about his attempt to woo Hermione just wanted to know what you guys think- should I add it here or do a side oneshot? Let me know as well as any other comments and suggestions in review.**


	16. Chapter 16

**Ah, ridiculously long delays again. My apologies. Thanks to everyone who continues to read despite my ineptness, to everyone who favorites and puts on alert and to Black4minister for the review.**

* * *

Upon reaching the Burrow, Ron's panic did not subside. If anything, his mood had deteriorated from being able to at least string together words, though in an incoherent fashion, to barely being able to go past a single syllable. So much had his nerves consumed him, that Harry and he had been standing in front of the Burrow for a good fifteen minutes as Ron attempted to gather himself and Harry attempted to restrain both his laughter and his annoyance every time Ron walked up to the door in determination only to turn around in fear.

"What if she doesn't want me?" Ron asked once again as he turned away from the door for the hundreth time in Harry's estimation.

"Then you'll die alone, a sad, pathetic man, with loads of pigmy puffs to keep you company." Harry replied, rolling his eyes. He had long since resigned himself from being Ron's cheerleader on the matter of Hermione, as the red head had asked him this same question repeatedly for the past half hour. "Come on, it will be fine. Just do it." Harry tried to comfort the boy upon seeing his eyes widen in fear of his potential future.

"Bu-but don't you think I should do something...big? At least some flowers or chocolates..." Ron began to strategize and Harry sighed.

"You want to waste more time? She could have gone off you by now." Harry said, trying desperately to move the plan along and at least cross the threshold of the house.

"Oh sweet Merlin, what if she has?!" Ron panicked, "What if she's found some other bloke? I'm doomed."

"She's been at the your's the whole summer, who's she going to find?"

"Maybe she's moved on to Charlie, the smooth git. Or Percy, those two have loads in common with their rule abiding, study hard bollucks!" Harry sighed again, feeling slightly guilty for making matters worse.

"If she had wanted any of your brothers and not you, she would have kissed them, wouldn't she?"

"I suppose." Ron answered, hesitantly.

"If she wanted any other bloke, would she have kissed you?"

"...No."

"Then stop worrying about this and just tell her you like her. Merlin, Ron, it's not that difficult."

It was, of course, at that moment that Harry had to eat his words as the door swung open behind them, Ginny coming wand in hand to investigate the noises coming from their front door. Looking down at the nerve racked Ron and Harry's awkward hand on his friend's shoulder, she shook her head in annoyance and put her wand away.

"What are you two doing out here?" She asked.

"Oh..um, Ron's a little... a little nervous about something." Harry explained, feeling his face flush under her stare.

"Nervous? about what?" She asked, Harry took a quick glance behind her, inside the cozy home and saw laying on a couch, reading. His eyes flickered back to her and he mouthed Hermione's name and realization dawned on her, "Ahh, well it's about time, eh?" She said, nudging her brother playfully in the ribs as he rose. He groaned loudly.

"Well, come on then, mate," Harry goaded, "It's now or never then, isn't it?"

Though still looking a bit ill, Ron entered the home and strode over to where Hermione comfortably sat. Harry stayed where he was, wincing slightly at Ron's decision to interrupt Hermione's reading of all things to bring up a conversation about their relationship. It was not the best of times. Hermione with a book in her hand was a dangerous Hermione to interrupt. By his side, he noticed Ginny seemed to share the same sentiment.

"Smooth," She mumbled sarcastically as a slightly annoyed, yet intrigued Hermione followed a very red Ron outside, "Impeccable timing, that one." She observed.

"Cut him some slack," Harry defended, though he was chuckling, "He's very confused."

"What do you mean?"

"Apparently he thought that because they kissed-"

"They kissed?!"

"Once, at Hogwarts. Before...everything happened."

He was unsure of whether to pinpoint the timing for her. He did not exactly want to say, ' you know, right before your brother was killed'. Nor was he particularly comfortable saying something else like, 'right before I killed Voldemort and single handedly saved us all because I'm just that awesome'. She seemed to understand, however, as she cleared her throat, wanting more information regarding their friends rather than a rehashing of the events of that tragic night.

"Anyway, they kissed, and he figured that just meant they were together. But he hasn't exactly shared that theory with Hermione."

"Hopeless git." Ginny said with a sigh and a giggle.

"Well, he's trying to rectify it now, so let's hope he's not completely hopeless."

"Come on, then," She replied, grabbing his hand easily and guiding him to the back, where Ron and Hermione were, "We probably don't want to miss this."

"Shouldn't we give them a little privacy?" Harry asked, hesitant to interfere. Ginny simply pulled out some extendable ears and smiled.

"And miss Ron making a fool of himself? But how will we mock him?"

"Ginny..." Harry warned.

"Come _on_," Ginny whined a little, "Do you really want to miss Ron trying to express his emotions?" There was a small pause as Harry thought of this. He grinned mischievously.

"Let's go."

----------

As Ron walked Hermione out into the garden he knew perfectly well he had to act fast. Not because acting fast would help win over Hermione, or even that speed meant he would fare better personally, but rather he knew perfectly well how deviant his little sister was. She would no doubt be sneaking up at any moment once Harry filled her in about what was going on. Harry, the poor boy, was doubt spilling his guts to the girl. He was powerless when it came to her and would no doubt be by her side, hiding in the bushes, watching.

So Ron wanted to make this fast. Not the most romantic of situations, he knew. Saying 'hey babe, can we hurry this up so the others don't take the mickey' would probably not help woo Hermione, but he wanted this to be their moment. Just the two of them, finally taking a step forward together. Besides, he had spent seven years dancing around his feelings. Compared to that, the last few weeks assuming, apparently falsely, they were already together had been bliss. An extra fifteen seconds being used to gather his thoughts intelligently seemed like a ridiculous waste of time not being with her.

"_Hermiwanatayoubus..._" Which is why he probably said something like that instead of actual coherent words.

"Sorry? Ron I didn't catch that." Hermione replied, slightly annoyed still at having her leisurely reading time interrupted for mumbling.

Ron sighed in frustration, running his hands through his hair, trying to regroup. He was finding that difficult whilst watching her, brow furrowed, hands on her hips, instead finding his thoughts wandering to what it would be like to kiss her again. He groaned once more in exasperation. Why was this so difficult? He had been dreaming of this girl, this one girl, for years. There were things he'd been wanting to tell her since longer than he cared to remember. All those words, those sentiments and mushy declarations of love were racing through his mind all at once. It shouldn't be so difficult to grasp a few and use his bloody mouth.

Except that he couldn't. It would be right. Not with Hermione. In all the years they had known each other, words were never their primary form of communication. Sure they bickered, and occasionally screamed at one another, but it was never the words in the argument that were important. It was everything beneath the surface they never verbalized. Everything that had advanced their relationship, however glacially in speed, had been with little or no petty words getting the way. They were beyond words.

"Bollucks to this." He muttered under his breath, and before Hermione could reprimand him on his choice of words, he closed the distance between them and planted a grand kiss on her lips, hardly noticing her gasp, or the ones coming from inside the house.

----------

"Wow." Was all Harry could respond with. Having finally caught up to his two best friends he did not find Ron making heartfelt confessions, but rather snogging Hermione quite adamently.

"Cheeky bastard!" Ginny declared, equally surprised, "He sure acts quick."

As they watched the pair further, however, Harry noticed that perhaps Ron was not quite as suave as they thought. Despite being a very, er, willing participant in the snog session, Hermione was quite surprised and out of breath once the parted, though her lack of oxygen may have been a result of the lengthy kiss in Harry's opinion.

"So, er, there's that," Harry heard Ron say after a moment, about as out of sorts about his actions as Hermione.

"Yes, I suppose that is...something." She replied, shell shocked, "What was that exactly?"

"That was..." Ron seemed to be unsure how exactly to describe his actions. To be fair to Hermione, Harry supposed, it did come out of virtually nowhere. Ron may have thought they were together, but she was still clearly of another opinion and suddenly having her best mate kiss her must be a little off putting. Finally, Ron finished with an unsure shrug.

"Well do you care to fill me in on what it was you were thinking just now?" She asked.

"That these last couple weeks have been brilliant."

"And so to celebrate you kiss me?"

"Well, no, see-"

"Because if you were just doing it because I-I happened to k-kiss you-"

"No! That's not-"

"And you think I'll just do so at your beck and call-"

"Hermione! Please, that wasn't what I meant!"

Harry was admittedly shocked to find Ron trying to be the voice of reason as a fight seemed to be imminent. Usually, he was much more used to the instigator role in their verbal brawls. It seemed Hermione was not used to this switch of positions either, as she quieted her quickly formulating tirade and decided to listen to Ron, who's nerves seemed to have made him start twitching slightly in Harry's eyes.

"I'm n-not very good with words...clearly," The boy started, "I-I just thought, I mea-mean. You kissed me." There was a pause. Apparently that was his rather ridiculous reasoning.

"Yes..." Hermione goaded, wanting more information.

"A-and I guess I just kind of figured that was it."

"It?"

"For us. That we were...you know. To-together." He stammered, whispering the last part. Hermione's features softened slightly and turned pink.

"So you th-thought we were already together and were just...kissing your..."

"Girlfriend." He finished for her, "But no, that's not it."

Harry groaned, as did Ginny. Ron's attempt to be completely honest, while admirable, was not helping him clear the situation with Hermione. Her eyes became stormy and confused again.

"I was talking with Harry and he kind of showed me that I've blown this. Quite spectacularly, apparently." He attempted to clarify, kicking a mound of dirt, looking down.

"You haven't blown it." Hermione mumbled quietly. Ron's eyes brightened.

"Really?"

"We kind of thrive on false starts and bad communication, don't we?" She joked slightly.

"Suppose you're right," Ron replied, turning red, "I reckon I'm getting a bit tired of it, how about you?"

"Definitely."

As the two exchanged nervous smiles, Harry let out a breath he didn't remember holding. He was getting a bit tired of their false starts as well, and seeing his two friends shyly hold hands, and Hermione give Ron a chaste kiss on the cheek, he felt a surge of happiness for the two of them.

"Oi!" Ron suddenly shouted, bewildering Hermione, "You two can come out now! I'm sure you've been watching since the start."

Sheepishly, Harry and Ginny revealed themselves to a slightly annoyed Ron and a scandalized looking Hermione. Though she was turning pink at the realization that the two had been watching her and Ron, she shared a secretive smile with Ginny as Ron gave Harry a playful punch on the arm, beaming with happiness all along.

"Just since you started snogging her like a madman." Ginny joked, turning her older brother's cheeks red.

"Anyway," Harry interrupted, trying to spare his friend more embarrassment, "I suppose I should turn in."

"What?" Ginny asked, surprised, "It's only half past." Harry shifted uncomfortably.

"Yeah," He said slowly, "But I thought I may get another couple memories in before I go to sleep."

"He's got a point," Ron tried to help, obviously seeing the discomfort in Ginny, "Made a lot of headway last time with me."

"Hardly," Harry could not help but scoff, "I still don't see a bright future for them. Dad's still a git, and a liar now too." He finished angrily, remembering James' treatment of Snape after almost a year of pretending.

"Mate, what are you talking about?" Ron asked.

"The whole nice guy act." Harry clarified. He thought they had been on the same page after the incident with Snape and afterwards with Lily in the common room, refusing to apologize.

"It wasn't an act." Ron said, confused.

"What do you mean, you saw that last part with him and Snape."

"Well, yeah, I mean if I was going through the same thing he was, I'd lash out too. I'm surprised it wasn't sooner, everything piling up like that. Kept a cool head for the most part."

"What are you talking about?" Harry wanted to scream at his friend, but managed to bite it out at normal volume.

"You didn't see the note?" Ron asked, Harry furiously shook his head, "Your dad got a letter from his mum. His father...your grandfather is sick..." Harry felt a sudden tug in his gut.

"He's dying."

* * *

**Right, well, sorry for the delay and for the fact that there won't be a new chapter next week- I'm going to California and thus will be away from my lovely computer. I will try my hardest to put up another chapter right before I leave but can't make any promises as my job is trying to suck all they can from me before I leave and I have to pack and such. Sorry.**

**Anyway, the story. Any comments or suggestions? Please review.**


	17. Chapter 17

**Wow. All I can say is sorry. There were mitigating factors, but I doubt it's of any relevance to anyone so I'll just say thank you to anyone still reading after the delay and everyone who has read, favorited, alerted, and Nightwing27, Pyre Jane, Black4minister, and Love Among The Ruins for taking the time to review.**

**Enjoy.**

* * *

He forgot everything after that. He did not hesitate more than a second before departing once more from the burrow and back to the pensieve. Even Ginny had not made an objection as he left, understanding even if it was something she could not fully understand.

Leaving them behind he went back to the moment Ron had mentioned he saw the note as he departed and looked back again, scouring the scene for the same letter his friend had seen. He wasn't sure why, exactly, he went back or why he thought it was important to see for himself. He believed Ron and did not doubt the change in his father was most likely coming from this event, but still, he had to see it for himself. He needed to read the letter for himself.

He read. He felt his heart drop as the letters spelled out in clear words that James' father was likely not going make it much longer, that Harry's grandfather would not make it much longer. He wasn't sure if it was sympathy for his father, or his own painful realization that, even having never met the man, he was losing yet another member of his family.

He sat for a while on James' bed, indifferent to the memory occurring beneath him somewhere in the castle of his father's heart breaking just a little bit more, not sure what to do. There was nothing he could do to change this fact, the man he didn't know but was closely tied to was going to die. James would know that pain, just as he did. It was a link, finally, to his father. Sure, he looked like the man, and had the same mischievous nature- though in his defense it was more a necessity than for fun- and yet he didn't see anything in him from his father until this moment.

He mirthlessly chuckled at the fact that their connection was once again death, but could at least understand now some of his father's actions. He was in pain and afraid, but he was trying to mature. He was trying to become the man of the house, but it was too late for him. He would always be known as a prankster and care-free slacker. It didn't matter that his grades were just as good as Lily and Remus' or that he tried to make himself more responsible when the time for it came. He was trapped in the role he inadvertently made for himself when he was trying to enjoy school with his friends. Harry could at least understand it, and for once, his contempt for some of his father's actions disappeared.

Sitting only a few moments longer, he decided to rise from his father's empty bed and allowed himself to be tugged out of the world and back into his own. He was mildly shocked to see that his friends had not followed him, but understood they probably thought he wanted to be on his own. It was true, but he still felt slightly disappointed. With no one to talk to, he felt the urge again to return to the memories and did not resist.

Stepping into their sixth year he found himself on the train back to Hogwarts in a compartment he had never stood in himself, but knew well. As the rest of the prefects milled about carelessly, making small talk about their summers and gossip, Lily Evans paced back and forth, furiously. The fact that she was clearly the only person in the compartment that seemed particularly bothered by anything just seemed to make her more incensed. It looked as if perhaps Remus had known better than to try to calm her, and merely allowed her to tread a hole into the carpet floor.

"I cannot believe this!" She finally proclaimed, taking Remus from his lull of watching her indifferently.

"Sorry?" Remus asked. He wanted, frankly, to clarify what exactly what her problem was, though he suspected he knew what it was.

"We're meant to set an example, all prefects, and one has the audacity to be late to the first meeting?" She fumed, "And from Gryffindor no less!"

"Um, I'm sorry, Lily..." Remus tried, suddenly, she reared toward him.

"Why are _you_ sorry?" She eyed him suspiciously.

"I-I" Remus stuttered, frightened of the rather imposing figure of the red head who stood quite a few inches shorter than him.

"Who's the new prefect, Remus?" She asked, a mix of incredulity and disbelief. He did not answer.

He did not need to. Instead, a loud bang reverberated through the room, hushing most other conversation. Lily's icy stare did not leave Remus, who was not quite flustered and refused to return the contact. Suddenly, the compartment door swung open grandly and two figures walked in ceremoniously, as if they were conquering heroes back from the far reaches of the globe. In reality, they were just back from the loo, where they had been planning something much grander for an entrance, but instead caught a second year trying to explode the toilets.

"Hold your applause," Sirius called out, the small boy held firmly by his collar in his hands, "We've just performed our civic duty is all."

Lily seemed apoplectic. In the whole span of the school there were very few people they could have chosen that would have made a worse prefect than Sirius Black and the only examples of worse she could even think of were the Slytherins who had already received Death Eater status.

"There is no way on Dumbledore made you a prefect." She stated, half in shock, half furious.

"Why Lily, I'm hurt." Sirius feigned, "But fear not, I'm not a prefect, thank Merlin."

"Then what are you doing here?"

"Introducing my dear friend-"

"Oh no-"

"Mr. James Potter!" Sirius announced, clapping wildly as most others looked on in amusement with the noted exceptions of Lily and the Slytherin prefects. James was all smiles as he entered the compartment, showing no sign of the stress at home, Harry noted.

"Thank you, Sirius." He replied, and readied himself for a speech, "And thank you-"

"You are late." Lily interrupted, "And you aren't supposed to be here." She threw at Sirius.

"If you hadn't noticed, I was busy doing our job." James defended, rearing his head to the boy they had apprehended. He looked at him, unsure for a moment before turning to Remus and asking, "What do we do with him, by the way? Arrest him? Torture him?" The boy cowered in fear and Remus took him from Sirius' grasp.

"You are expected to meet here before going on rounds in the train, if you had been here on time you would know what to do in this sort of situation."

"If I _had_ been here on time, we would have had flooded toilets all down the corridors because no one would have stopped Timmy here."

"My name's Gordon."

"Quite Timmy," Sirius hushed.

"Get out!" Lily shouted at him.

"Aww, I don't want to have to spend my time with Peter alone." Sirius whined.

"Out!" She repeated, incensed.

"Lighten up, Evans, I'm not that late. Besides, no one else seems to care that much," James proclaimed as he took his seat, as did everyone but Lily, who stood before him, arms crossed.

"You are missing the point entirely," She fumed, " We are meant to set an example. How on earth could Dumbledore think someone who-ugh!" She could not even finish her insult.

"What, someone who gets good grades, participates actively in school activities, and is generally likable?"

"Hexing first years isn't a school activity."

Before James could retort, and he was perfectly willing to wage verbal battle against her, the head boy and girl stepped in, though mostly because they wanted to get the meeting over with. In fact, they were looking forward to another sparring match between the two, but would have rather liked to get to their friends at some point in the day. Throughout the meeting, Harry noticed James take no interest in Lily, instead concentrating on those talking and occasionally whispering something to Remus. Lily, however, could hardly concentrate on anything other than James.

"How do you feel about being partners for rounds?" James asked, wiggling an eyebrow and wrapping his arm around a flustered Lily, "Not that I particularly want to be partnered with you, but you see Remus over there has a bit of a crush on my future partner and wants to spend a few nights with her alone if you catch my meaning?"

One look at the pair James pointed at and anyone could tell this was far from the truth. Remus was very absorbed in some reading material while the girl in question was busy fussing over a Hufflepuff boy who seemed equally interested.

"How did you do it?" She asked the boy, clearly still upset.

"What, become this devilishly handsome? Wish I could say it was me-"

"How did you become a prefect? Everyone knows you are the most irresponsible student here, no matter if they like you or not. Did you go to Dumbledore? Maybe your parents did?" James involuntarily stiffened at her words. Even Lily seemed to be caught off guard by his reaction. A silence loomed as if both were watching the words float about the room. Harry was not sure if it was because Lily knew about his father dying, or if perhaps she had interpreted his shock differently, and thought she was right about his gaining the position of prefect through disreputable means.

Unfortunately, Harry was not given an answer as the scene before him disappeared and he was back at Hogwarts and the familiar, indescribable warmth of the Great Hall on the first day of school. For the first time, he was not around Lily or James, but rather the rest of the marauders, busily eating their meal and joking until finally, Peter noticed James missing.

"He's probably off being a specky little git, prancing around with his badge," Sirius joked.

"Hey, I'm a prefect too!" Remus said, mockingly indignant.

"You can pull being a git off." Sirius complimented. Sort of.

"Look, over there." Peter pointed towards the doors, where Lily stood, wand out and pointed at someone. It was not, as Harry expected, his father, but rather an unknown student about their age in green and silver robes. By his side stood Severus Snape. By hers stood James Potter. Never ones to leave their friend stranded, all three boys rose and headed to the action, however they were shocked to see James diffuse the situation, lowering Lily's wand hand and saying something one had to assume was less that pleasant to the Slytherins.

The group departed without incident and the boys sat back down, slightly dumbfounded. Having the metabolism of teenage boys, however, they soon returned to their meal, barely taking note of whether or not their friend had actually joined them or not. In fact he had not. Still walking to the tables, his friends did not notice what Harry had. Ever so quietly, though with enough conviction Harry could read it on her lips, he saw Lily thank James. He merely smiled back before joining his friends. She watched him sit before joining hers.

After that, there seemed to be some sort of unspoken agreement between his parents. They still were hardly even friends, but no more did Lily speak of James' prefect appointment being a joke, nor did James go out of his way to tease or mock Lily. They existed in the same space as civilly as he had ever seen them before. While it was of comfort to see that they could get along relatively well, Harry tired of Remus' meticulous inclusion of every moment from borrowing a quill in class to saying "excuse me" when in tight quarters or to returning that same quill later. Perhaps he needed a girl's eye to see why any of these moments were significant, after all Hermione had at one point explained in much the same fashion how some of his and Ginny's seemingly innocuous interactions before they got together were actually declarations of love, but the lack of development bored him.

He was still unsure whether or not Lily knew about his grandfather being ill. He suspected James was unsure as well, but did not want to risk revealing the information in order to learn the truth. If she did know, she was acting as if she did not, though carefully avoiding the subject of parents- though, in truth, they did not exactly speak intimately enough for the topic to ever naturally arise anyway.

There were developments, however. Slow moving increments indicating that perhaps the two of them were not lost causes. Sitting in Slughorn's potions class, mixing elixirs Harry did not even want to venture to recall, the professor came upon Lily's brew.

"Excellent, just excellent! My dear this is brilliant. Why is it you weren't sorted into my house, a brain like that?"

"But professor," she said in a mock incredulous tone, "I thought you said I was brilliant?"

"Yes?"

"Then how on earth could I have _ever_ gotten into Slytherin with a brilliant mind?"

James roared with laughter as Slughorn, slightly flustered, chuckled and grinned, accepting the small ribbing only because she was such a good student, Harry knew. A few feet away Severus scowled at the pair of them. More importantly, the moment James echoed his approval with laughter, a small, satisfactory smile crept upon Lily's lips as she continued to stir her potion.

Moments later, Harry was in the hallways, corridors brimming with students as Filch posted with a sneer notification of the first Hogsmeade trip of the year. Third years finally able to partake in the trip anxiously bustled to learn of the date. Above the throngs stood the taller sixth years including James, Sirius, Remus, and Lily. Lily looked as casually as possible and for a moment locked eyes with James, knowing what to expect next.

He would ask her to accompany him, she would decline. It was the same pattern they had since the first time he tried in fourth year. Except this time was different. The date was fairly close to then, Harry postulated by the conversation around them, and yet James made no move. He merely turned back from the crowd, and exited calmly. Lily looked on, somewhat at a loss for the change in routine. There was something else, Harry noticed, in her eyes, another feeling that may have been more confusing than the fact that James did not ask her out. Harry suspected he knew what it was, too. To him, Lily seemed ever so slightly disappointed.

* * *

**Okay, again, sorry about such a long break but on the bright side I do have the last chapters written, so it's just a matter of finding some free time to edit and post. Hopefully it won't be so long between chapters.**

**More on sixth year next week.**

**Comments? Suggestions? Review!**


	18. Chapter 18

**Slightly shorter break between chapters! Whoo! Thanks to all who are reading, favoriting, and putting on alert and, as always, to Love Among the Ruins and Black4minister for the reviews. Enjoy.**

* * *

As James left Harry pondering just as much as Lily about his lack of smarmy date proposal, the scene changed again, back to the halls of Hogwarts. This time, it was dark and Lily seemed to be alone. Knowing this could not be true, Harry looked around with no success for another party. No one was there. Suddenly, James rushed up to the girl, who seemed annoyed, though relented the emotion for a moment in favor of confusion once James joined her.

"Sorry, Evans, Remus couldn't be here tonight, he asked me to take over." James proclaimed as he and Harry caught up with her.

"What? Why couldn't he make it?" Lily asked, skeptical.

"He just...couldn't." James tried, and Lily rolled her eyes.

"If this is another foolish ploy to try to-"

"I promise you, Remus simply could not make it." James proclaimed, placing hand across his heart, a gesture he was most likely not above faking.

Harry glanced outside of the moonlit castle window, however, and noticed a rather full and round moon shining above the two. He knew James was not lying. Lily, however, was not one to trust the boy without several written and notarized pieces of evidence to back the story up. She stared a moment longer at the boy's attempt at innocence and decided to trust him, at least for the time being. She unfolded her arms.

"Well, come on then, we're late with rounds." James followed, much like a puppy, behind her, unable to hide his grin.

Inexplicably, time seemed to speed up, but only for a moment, and Harry was in another hall. Though each one was quite similar in Hogwarts, he knew he was not in the same place he had been in moments earlier. Again, he vaguely wondered where the third set of eyes was that allowed him to witness this memory, but was met only with his parents. His confusion was quickly diverted into happiness as his parents closed the distance between them and him. Lily was actually laughing. A quite giggle as James recited a story, grinning at her. Out of amusement or accomplishment though, Harry could not tell.

"Merlin, what did you two do?" She asked through her chuckle.

"Well, we couldn't well let them go, could we?" James replied, "It would be against the strict moral code of being a prefect." He said with a sarcastic huff before resuming his own laughter.

Lily's face fell and the hall soon filled with awkward silence without her own laugh following James'. Even he noticed the lack of amusement from his partner and stopped laughing himself. Though it was clear she was upset, James had no idea what he had done this time to make her hate him. Admittedly, it was usually pretty easy to identify the exact reason she was upset. There were a number of reasons for that. The one he would tell everyone was because, frankly, he upset her so much he could just tell what set her off. The reason he kept to himself was the fact that he watched her so much, at this point any emotion she could possibly express had a particular place in James' mind and heart.

"Why do you always do that?" She asked quietly.

"Do _what_?" A part of his question was almost playful, as if he was playing dumb, but the other seemed to stem from legitimate frustration. After all, he could read her emotions, that didn't mean he knew _why_ she acted the way she did.

"Belittle everything I take seriously." She said, slightly angry.

"I-I didn't know I did." She rolled her eyes as he stuttered in surprise.

"Oh, please. Prefect duties, grades, O.W.L.S, N.E.W.T.S..." she began to rattle off.

"Maybe it's because you take _everything_ seriously." James replied, frustrated.

"I do not!"

"Seriously, maybe you should try not to think about all that stuff all the time and relax. Have fun."

"I think you have enough fun for the both of us. For the entire school, actually."

"And what's that supposed to mean?"

"If I'm too serious, you're not serious enough."

"Ah," James said slyly, "A perfect match then. We compliment each other."

"There you go again," She sighed, "Just when we had an opportunity to discuss the issues we may have with each other you go making snide comments. Avoiding a serious issue."

"I'm not avoiding the issue," He mumbled.

"Then why don't we discuss this, right now. You think I'm too serious, what else do you take issue with?" She said, arms crossed in defiance. He was silent but she would not relent.

"Nothing." He said simply, but low. Harry could barely hear him, "There's absolutely nothing wrong with you."

Lily's posture melted slightly, and James did not break eye contact with her. She looked ready to ask another question or yell or jump into his arms at any moment. Her face was unreadable for Harry and for a split second he pitied himself in never being able to see that expression for himself in his mother, never seeing it cast at him or any other look cast his way from either of the two that stood before him. It lasted only a moment, though, as the tension built with each second that Lily did not respond and James did not take back the words. There was so much either could say at that moment, to firmly let the other know where they stood.

Before either could respond, however, there was a loud clang from one of the suits of armor that occupied to hall with the pair and Harry All eyes turned to the suit, forgetting for a moment anything said moments earlier. Suddenly Harry remembered his confusion earlier. Just how had he been able to watch this scene from a pensieve?

"Bollucks." The suit of armor.

"What the-" Lily started.

"Who's there?" James boomed, either from authority or anger that someone else may have heard his tiny confession.

"Sorry, mate," an unclaimed voice declared, "I was just trying to get to the kitchens for a snack. Didn't know I'd run into you lot."

James groaned as Lily gasped and Sirius removed the invisibility cloak from his body, a handful of tarts with him and a devilish grin. Harry was not thrilled that Sirius broke up that small moment between his parents, but he still couldn't help but smile as he appeared from out of nowhere, scaring the two prefects.

"How in Merlin did you just...appear like that?" Lily asked, not familiar with James' often used cloak.

"An invisibility cloak." James explained despondently.

"Those aren't allowed in Hogwarts, are they?" She asked both boys, automatically implicating James.

"No, but-"

"Hand it here." She said with authority, palm out to receive the material.

"Evans, I don't think-"

"Now." She said icily.

For a moment Sirius looked at James, as if to get permission. It was James', obviously, which was why he looked to him, but there was something else there too, a look Harry did not really recognize in his Godfather. After a moment of hesitation, James nodded at Sirius and he in turn handed the cloak to Lily. She looked appraisingly at the pair for a moment.

"See? I think this school could do with a little less fun and more time for serious. Especially with everything going on around us." She gestured broadly, and Harry knew she was talking about Voldemort.

"Our night's almost through," She continued, "Why don't we just pack it in?" James nodded his head and she swiftly exited in front of the two.

"Mate, I'm sorry," Sirius started once Lily was out of earshot.

"It's fine," James replied tersely.

"But the cloak, your father's-"

"I said it was fine." James reiterated just as sharply as before, "Let's go."

Harry left the memory feeling a wave of sadness for both of his parents. There was no way Lily could have known the cloak belonged to James, and no way she could have known it was from his father. Harry wasn't even certain she knew his father was dying, or what significance the piece of cloth had to the family. Then there was his father, too proud to tell her, or too scared, he wasn't sure. She would be angry to learn it was his own device for mischief, but he didn't seem willing to tell her about why he had it or who gave it to him.

"I don't believe this!" Sirius suddenly proclaimed, bringing Harry to the scene before him.

"Sorry, mate."

"No, you're not."

"No, actually, I find this pretty amusing."

"Thanks."

"No problem."

In a fairly typical scene Harry had learned to recognize as commonplace with Sirius and James, they sat beside each other on a long bench beside Dumbledore's office. Usually, they were laughing with each other, and reliving their latest adventure in between fits of laughter. This time, however, was different. Harry could almost immediately tell. Sirius sat pouting, complaining. James sat comfortably, Prefect badge looking as if it had been recently shined, chuckling softly at the predicament.

"I thought we were friends!" Sirius continued to argue.

"Best mates." James assured him.

"Then how could you do this to me?"

"It had to be done."

"You would have done the same."

"Not anymore, mate, things have changed."

"Unbelievable." Remus quickly rounded the corner as Sirius sighed.

"I had to see this for myself." Remus proclaimed, joining James in laughter.

"Oh, good, a crowd." Sirius moaned.

"I can't believe you actually did it." Remus said in awe of James.

"Yeah, well, what can I say..."

"Maybe, 'I'm a giant git not fit to have friends as great as Sirius Black'?" Sirius suggested.

"What was he trying to do?" Remus asked James, ignoring Sirius.

"I caught him trying to sneak into the girl's dorm."

"Or how about, 'I'm not nearly as attractive as Sirius. And I've got ridiculous hair.'"

"Isn't it charmed to prevent us from going up there?" Remus asked, still disregarding Sirius' diatribe.

"Yeah. Saving him the embarrassment, really." James replied with a grin.

"Bollucks," Sirius declared, "You just wanted to do it because you can. Can't believe you would turn me in to Dumbledore!"

"You're next step was to use explosive charms on the staircase."

"And it would have worked!"

"Sorry, mate, someone had to put a stop to it."

Despite his initial anger at James turning him in, Sirius could not help but let slip a grin as the three sat outside the door, waiting for Dumbledore. From just around the corner, there was commotion and all three stood alert. Rearing into view was Snape and another green and silver clad student Harry could not immediately recognize. He was certain, however, that he saw a sliver of a dark mark on his arm. James did not seem to be concerned about this fact, nor Sirius or Remus, but his attention was turned to the person guiding the two to the office- Lily.

Before the pair even passed by to sit on another nearby seat James had his wand out and Harry thought of his own time at school. It saddened him slightly to think that even in his parent's time, the time he had seen as idyllic compared to his own experiences, they were constantly aware of danger. The death eaters and Voldemort had taken it away form them too. He wondered if the only time the school had ever truly been safe was long before Riddle was ever born.

"Evans," James greeted with politeness, "Need some help there?"

"No, thank you," She answered with equal politeness, though it was slightly strained.

"Are you sure, Lily?" Remus asked again.

"Yes, thank you," She insisted, though her tone was harsher, "I'm sure you have your own hands full with the two of them," She nodded towards James and Sirius.

"Well, actually..." Remus started, but James waved him off.

"What did you two do this time anyway?" She asked, partly out of frustration and the awkward silence and cold stares she was receiving from Snape and the other Slytherin.

"I was trying to enjoy a pleasant afternoon-"

"In the girl's dorms-"

"But _someone_ had to stop me."

"And I suppose you were providing the explosives?" She reared toward James, he smiled.

"Please, this git, my supposed best mate, decided to be responsible or some other such nonsense." Sirius scoffed.

"Wait, you _stopped_ him?" Lily asked, perplexed.

"It was a stupid plan." James shrugged, "What'd these two do?" He asked, though she was still marveling at the concept of James doing anything to stop trouble at school.

"Shove off, Potter." The Slytherin bit. Severus stayed quiet. He would not stop looking at Lily, who would look anywhere but at him.

"I caught them working in Slughorn's classroom without permission." She explained.

"Merlin, even when they break the rules their lame." Sirius scoffed.

"Listen here, blood traitor-" The Slytherin started and immediately Sirius rose to defend himself, wand out.

"Calm down, everyone." James suggested, holding Sirius back, Lily attempted to do the same with the Slytherin boy.

"Get your filthy hands off of me Mudblood!" He shouted the moment her hand touched him.

She recoiled a bit at the words. Severus remained sitting, doing nothing. James let go of Sirius, letting Remus keep him calm, but was unable to hold in his own emotions. Striding quickly past Lily as an imposing force against the boy he backed him up against the walls of the hallway, wand at his throat. The boy reached for his own, but James quickly swatted it away.

"Don't you dare call her that!" He snarled.

"James!" Lily shouted, half admonishing him for his behavior, half out of fear of it. Her tone worked. For a moment James stood, unrelenting, staring icily at the boy, but finally let him go. The boy immediately retreated to where Severus still sat, unmoving through all the action. Now, he could not keep eye contact with Lily. Just as James regained his composure the door to Dumbledore's office swung open.

"Ah, it seems my halls are a little crowded, aren't they?" Dumbledore smiled, "Mr. Potter, Mr. Black, I spoke with Professor McGonagal, she seems willing to settle the matter of Mr. Black's punishment on her own. You three boys can run along back to class." Sirius did not seem to know whether or not to be relieved or more frightened regarding McGonagal doling out the punishment, but followed his orders and began walking back to the common room with Remus. James stayed put.

"Is something the matter, Mr. Potter?" Dumbledore asked.

"No, sir, I just wanted to make sure Ev-er- Lily would make it back alright too."

"I don't see why she has to stay with us, this is just a small matter, should only take a moment with myself and these two boys. Ms. Evans, why don't you head back as well?" Dumbledore replied warmly.

"Yes, sir." She replied.

Harry smiled, though the scene was wrought with tension. He hadn't seen Snape anywhere near his mother since the incident last year, and he could tell the time apart had made the boy much more like the man he knew and loathed for so long. Still, it was slightly sad to see their inability to confront each other with their problems. That wasn't what made him smile, though, it was his parents. For the first time, they had both called each other by their first names.

Sirius and Remus waited for the two others to join them as they walked. She muttered a quick thank you to James as they walked to catch up to the others, he smiled warmly to her and looked back at the Slytherins. Lily did not.

* * *

**These two were kind of long memories so instead cramming them in the last chapter I broke their sixth year up a couple more times, there's one more for their sixth year at least...I may add more.**

**Anyway, Comments? Suggestions? Review please.**


	19. Chapter 19

**Thanks to everyone who's read, favorited, put on alert and to Love Among the Ruins, Black4minister, EJam, and musicforlife for reviewing. Enjoy!**

* * *

As time passed days and months at a time Harry watched the distance grow irreparable between Severus and Lily. It had already practically disappeared that fateful day in fifth year, but at this point Lily almost seemed to be...rubbing it in to her former friend. Class with him, especially during potions, seemed to be an exercise in belittling the Slytherin house. James and the rest of the Gryffindors laughed, of course, while Snape just looked blankly at his potion work, ignoring her only to keep up appearances, though still glancing at her when she wasn't looking and making sure some of the other Slytherins didn't get to aggressive in their own comebacks with whispered hushes that, if Lily noticed, didn't seem to make a difference.

Eventually her behavior even dulled in the rest of the Gryffindors, who barely took notice whenever Slughorn would make a comment about her joining his Slytherin and her responding venomously. For his part, Slughorn would allow her to make comments and occasionally chuckle in good humor. He was not about to anger a prize pupil for such comments, after all. It would be much better to keep her in good terms to have her in his collection.

Interestingly enough, there seemed to be a small role reversal between Lily and James, if ever so slightly. While Lily gained some more playful confidence when it came to academics, much as James had throughout the years, James seemed to buckle down. Being Quidditch captain, prefect, dealing with his father's illness, and on top of that school must have changed his priorities, Harry assumed, and made pranks a rare treat. Vaguely, Harry wondered how Ron had dealt with an equal load his sixth year _and_ on top of that, Lavender Brown following him like a very talkative puppy. He was beginning to suspect his friend was much more impressive than he let on.

It was a small change in the two, one that hardly anyone noticed in the two. Except of course, the two in question. When Lily would make a harmless joke in class, for a split second the two would always make eye contact, just as they did when Lily would overhear the word "study" uttered through James' lips. It was as if they were rubbing off on each other if ever so slightly. He wasn't quite sure if they were happy about it either, until he found himself in Hogsmeade, bustling students enjoying their first weekend out of the castle.

For weeks Lily had tried and, Harry presumed because of their inclusion in the pensieve, failed to subtlety gather information from Remus during rounds about James. Some were innocent enough questions regarding whether or not he was going to Hogsmeade, than more obvious ones about _who_ he was going with. Every now and then she would even hint that she was available to be asked, though Harry suspected she would say no to James, she just wanted the option.

For his part Remus could tell what she was up to and very rarely gave much information out about James. Harry wondered why exactly he did this. As far as he knew, Remus supported their potential relationship, with the exception of the times he felt James was being particularly callous and rude, but still the boy was not willing to tell the girl anything. Finally, just one weekend from the trip, she cracked. Unfortunately, it was not an opportune time for Remus.

"What do you mean 'cancel rounds'?" She asked the boy as he tried to monitor the time from the clock behind her head.

"Erm, I have some work to do and won't be able to go tonight." He tried to evade her.

"Can't you get someone to replace you. What about, and I shudder to say this, James?"

"We're working on the project together."

"What project? I have the same class schedule you two do and I don't-"

"Er, it's not for school?" Though he didn't meant to, the words came out as a question and Lily's suspicions were not assuaged.

"Has this got something to do with James acting strange?" She asked, crossing her arms. Remus let out a groan, desperate to leave.

"He's _not_ acting strange-"

"Every Hogsmeade weekend since fourth year he's asked me to go with him and now suddenly he's stopped?"

"Does that upset you?" Remus could not help but ask with a smile. It did not help matters.

"Either you tell me what's going on with him or we have a nice chat about why exactly it is you always disappear during full moons." She declared evenly. Remus tried not to look surprised and to determine whether or not this was a bluff or not. She did not give an inch. He decided it was to dangerous to assume otherwise and his shoulders slumped.

"He's not acting strange because of you. He's been granted permission to go home during the weekend-

"To see his father?" In an instant Lily's face melted into sorrow and Remus was back to shocked.

"You are finding new and interesting ways to surprise me tonight, Evans." Remus chuckled. Though he was not one normally to call her by her last name, it was not meant with malice and Lily didn't seem to mind.

"I do have that affect on people," She replied without hint of emotion.

"How did you find out?"

"I heard rumblings, his behavior, I thought there may be a connection. At first I thought it was to impress me but..."

"Despite what you may think, he rarely does things merely to impress you."

"Really?"

"Well, no. Actually, quite a large portion of his behavior is solely dependent on getting your attention." Remus admitted. A response normally matched with an eye roll this time was met with a smile. They stood in silence for a moment before Lily coughed.

"Well, I suppose you should get going," She looked at the clock, "It's getting pretty late, it'll be dark soon." She said, with full emphasis on the time.

"Lily, I-"

"Don't worry, Remus, your secret is safe with me."

Harry smiled at his mother, just as Remus did before shuffling off- Remus to the Shrieking Shack and Harry to another memory. He knew at some point that Lily must have found out about Remus being a werewolf, but he had also sort of assumed that his father was the one to tell her, or perhaps even Remus. It struck him as odd that he never thought she would have figured it out herself, but nonetheless seeing her side with Remus warmed his heart.

Not long after that Harry was in the Gryffindor common room, sitting in relatively well behaved fashion beside the fireplace, studying. Or so it seemed, at least, in Sirius' case. He didn't seem too concerned with his transfiguration homework as much as he was with James. As James did his work, Sirius kept glancing at him before finally getting to the heart of whatever was bothering him.

"Just ask her!" He exclaimed in a hush.

"Sirius, no." James replied patiently.

"She didn't know it was yours, she doesn't know about your dad-"

"It's no big deal."

"But we're going to see your family this weekend."

"I don't think they're expecting me to bring along an invisibility cloak to see my father."

"You don't know that!" Sirius debated, "It's a family heirloom isn't it?"

"It doesn't matter," James said, annoyed, "It's not like dad will even be able to tell I'm there, will he?"

Sirius grew quiet and stared in mild shock and anger at James. The boy closed his book and waited. It was as if he knew that if he stared long enough, James would have to confront the words he had just uttered. Though he did not show it, there was a slight change in James that Harry knew was from what he had said.

It was not as if he didn't care his father was dying or that it would mean a lot to see his son once more before he passed. James knew quite well how difficult this weekend was going to be on him, seeing his father possibly for the last time. He was not trying to be callous, he was just stressed. To him, his father would have been gone long before actually dying. Add to that his equal insistence that his father could not possibly die, and he had enough conflicting thoughts to make the whole situation impossible to deal with, and something he did not want to be talking with Sirius about at that very moment.

"James, come on mate," Sirius started calmly after James refused to address him, "It's not like your the only one dealing with this." At this, James did look to his best friend.

"Don't start with that-"

"No, bollocks. You know very well your family has been more of a family to me than my own. I may have only been living with you guys last summer, but he's like a father to me as well." Sirius declared, "You mean the world to him and he needs to see you."

"I know," James sighed, "I'm sorry, you know I didn't mean for it to sound like that, it's just that-"

"Don't worry about it, mate," Sirius waved off any need for an explanation, "Just, think about asking her, yeah?"

Suddenly Harry was outside, the fall weather surrounding him as well as students from every house excitedly traveling to Hogsmeade. James and Sirius walked with Peter and Remus for a short distance, before starting to separate from the pair. Remus waved them farewell as Harry rushed to catch up to them. He was not sure if he wanted to join them if only to catch a glimpse of his grandfather or if there was perhaps something else drawing him to the pair. Beside him, a flash of red hair that made him think vaguely of Ginny and the rest of the Weasley's passed by him, beating him to James and Sirius. Lily held a package in her hands and called for the two to stop.

"Po-J-James!" She shouted, gaining his attention quickly. Though he was sullen for obvious reasons, he still smiled at the girl.

"Lily." He greeted simply as she stopped, suddenly either affected by the cold or embarrassment or perhaps something else with reddening cheeks.

"I-I wanted to return this to you," She said, shoving the package in his hands, "I didn't realize it was yours and not Sirius' and well, considering the situation..." Her voice trailed off, and James looked at her curiously.

"The situation?" He asked, and her cheeks grew flusher.

Gathering assumptions quickly, James turned immediately to Sirius, who did not seem as quick to the draw and just looked at James with confusion. Sensing it could not have been him, he looked back to the disappearing figures of Remus and Peter and narrowed his eyes. Harry was not quite sure why it made James slightly angry that Lily knew about his father, but watched with curiosity.

"I didn't really give Remus a choice," Lily clarified as James returned his gaze to her, "I threatened him with a few...other secrets he has."

"Didn't know you were such a gossip, Evans." Harry winced at the use of her last name. Lily just looked down.

"I-I just...thought I would give it back to you." She said, unable to look at him.

"Thank you." He said softly, reluctantly.

As she hurried off in the opposite direction as the crowds back to the castle for unknown reasons James opened the package. As soon as enough of it was revealed, Sirius whooped in excitement, and slapped James hard on the back in congratulations. As he fingered the fabric of his invisibility cloak, he did not stop watching Lily.

The memory shifted and, as if the threat of his father's death was no longer upon him, James Potter was high above the floor, hoisted upon the shoulders of teammates and fellow Gryffindors, holding up the Quidditch trophy in triumph as the crowds cheered all around him. He was laughing and smiling and, Harry was pretty sure, tearing up just a little bit. He remembered his time as victor in the sport and knew the tears well. They were happiness and excitement and fear all in one salty mixture.

Soon the whole of the Gryffindor common room was a party, any hope of studying a false dream for some, for others a reason to procrastinate longer. The crowds were buzzing and soon applauding once more as the Gryffindor team reappeared in clothing more appropriate for the party and less for the field.

Though for most of thee night James happily sat with the rest of the Marauders and chatted, replaying the exciting finish to the game and laughing along with jokes, he soon wandered off on his own, and watched instead in solitude as Sirius forced Remus into a reenactment of their victory for the amusement of the crowds. He still smiled, but Harry knew it was a different one from the one he had earlier that night.

"Congratulations, James." Lily smiled as she sat beside him on the staircase to the boy's bedrooms.

"Thank you."

"It's all very exciting," She continued, despite his lack of real response, "It's been quite some time since we won, hasn't it?"

"Yeah."

They sat in silence again, Lily accepting his new quiet nature. At first Harry thought it was uncomfortable for her, and silently wished his father would say something, but in reality, it would have ruined the moment if either of them had spoken then. It was not an awkward moment for the two, but rather a real one. They did not bicker, they did not put up defenses, they did not try to hide or reveal anything about themselves for the betterment of their image to one another. They just sat in comfortable silence with one another. Happy.

Of course, this did not last long. Just like every memory Harry had to leave. He did not know how long they sat together, nor did he know anyone who could tell him for sure what happened next. Instead he was moved along, left wondering, to the next memory. A mundane day followed, to his frustration. It seemed meaningless, to him, just a breakfast at in the great hall among stressed students cramming for exams and sleep deprived teens regretting the fun they had the night before. So ordinary, in fact, Harry hardly payed attention to the scene until the owls swooped into the room, releasing packages and letters throughout the room.

Softly, slowly, a letter fell towards James. There was nothing intimidating or threatening about the letter. A simple white envelope with neatly written handwriting and parchment no doubt inside. When it finally fell, however, James grew pale. Sirius and Remus stopped eating beside him, waiting for any news from their friend. Though they did not notice, from a few chairs down, Lily stopped eating as well. The air hung thickly in the room as James waited, not wanting the information nearly as much as the others.

"W-we all know what its going to say." He finally said to his friends, who refused to resume normal routines until he opened the thing.

"It could be nothing." Peter tried to offer.

"No," James said softly, "It's not nothing. I knew it was coming. It's okay, guys. Really."

Convincing as he was, the boys still hesitated before resuming their meals and speaking in hushed tones which only seemed to irritate James. He flipped the letter a few times in his hand looking over every inch of it before finally opening the thing to find exactly what he knew and dreaded was there. Harry read over his shoulder and learned that his grandfather, James' father had passed away the night before.

The room around him continued as usual, even his friends tried to put up the appearance of a normal day for him. All except Lily. The only person besides Harry to watch James Potter's facade break for a flicker of a moment. He was not the confident, outgoing boy who was popular with boys, girls, and even professors. He was not the star quidditch player or the star pupil. He was a boy who had just lost his father and for that flicker of a moment there was immense pain and grief on his face. She was the only one who saw, and the only one to watch as he resumed his meal with dignity before excusing himself to the restroom.

All three of his closest friends seem to debate what to do next. He had told them he was fine, and even if that was clearly false they were not ones to argue with James. It was a useless endeavor. Still, they knew he might need to talk or vent or do something to take his mind off his father's death. They were not the only ones debating whether or not to follow. Though there's was a vocal struggle, Lily seemed to be internally battling with the same decision. Quietly, she rose from the table and followed James' path.

Though her own friends did not notice this, Sirius, Remus, and Peter did. Soon after she disappeared behind James they followed, trying to be covert as they were guided by Lily, who was guided by some unknown trail that would lead to James. It took her no time at all to find the boy. As it turned out, it was not magical feat Lily just searched for a bathroom in which another student had been roughly turned out of. In this case, James was behind the doors despite the desperate pleas of a fifth year Ravenclaw.

Without word or probably much forethought she entered the bathroom. Behind her, Sirius, Remus, and Peter paused before the door. Having some sort of telekinetic conversation they decided not to follow Lily in, respecting the fact that this could have some sort of intimate connotations. It did not, however, stop them from opening the door just a crack and having a listen.

"Can I go in yet?" The fifth year asked the boys.

"Bugger off," Sirius shrugged him off, "We're in a bloody castle, there are plenty of other bathrooms." The boy left grumbling as they leaned in to listen. Harry entered the restroom to find his father facing the mirrors before the sinks, and Lily carefully teetering between him and the door, unsure of what exactly it was she was going to say.

"J-James?" She started cautiously.

"I'm fine, Lily," Though he used her proper name, his words were harsher than usual, "I just need a moment alone."

"Oh...Okay," She turned to the door, but relented, "I just wa-wanted you to know if you need s-some more time or something...Remus and I can take over your rounds tonight." She finished softly, and not at all with the words she truly wanted to say.

"Thank you." James said, finally looking at her and offering the tiniest of smiles. It gave Lily some confidence.

"An-and if you need to...talk or something. I can-"

James suddenly sighed, and looked down into one of the sinks once more. His hands were clamped on either side of the porcelain sink. His shoulders hunched over, it looked like he was trying to hold his patience with her. Lily on the other hand had no place to hide. She was exposed and he cheeks began to redden and eyes water as he seemed to reject having anything to do with her, even in a time of need.

"You don't have to do this." He said in a low and steady voice void of emotion.

"Do what?" She asked cautiously.

"Pity me."

"James, that's not at all-"

"Spare me. You've hated me since the first day we met, what on earth has changed except for my father being dead? You don't have to be nice to me because of that."

"James, that is not why I am being nice to you!"

"Then why?"

She paused for a moment, as if she wasn't even quite sure why it was she was behaving the say she was. There were plenty of things that had changed since their first year together at school. Her friendship with his biggest enemy had dissolved into nothing and with that she no longer had the regular beration of everything wrong with James. With that, perhaps she started to see the good in him, like having his best friend come live with his family when his own treated him poorly, or the responsibility he had taken as a prefect and with the news of his father. Maybe it was the fact that, no matter how much she denied it in all those years, she secretly liked the attention he would give her sometimes and was secretly hoping he would grow up enough for her to someday say yes. When she didn't immediately answer, James slowly slumped onto the floor beside one of the bathroom stalls.

"There, you see?" He claimed, "Don't worry about me, you don't have to."

"Well maybe I want to." She said, seating herself beside him on the floor.

"Why?" He sighed.

"Because," She sighed, "I misjudged you. All these years I thought you were an uncaring git who's sole goal in life was to torture those you thought were below you and generally make a mockery of everything that meant something to me."

"Merlin, am I really that bad?"

"No." She replied simply, "No you are much, much better than that. You are the boy who lets his friend live with him when he's afraid to go to his own home. You are the boy who keeps a dangerous secret for a friend when it could cost him everything for it to be revealed. You're the boy who sticks up for a girl even when she says she will hate you forever, and you are the boy who has matured beyond his perceived capacity in the face of something horrible. You are the kind of boy I would love to be friends with and help out when something this bad happens to him."

"Friends?" He asked, dubious. She smiled and nodded her head, "No chance for a little more, then?" He asked with a grin. She rolled her eyes playfully.

"Let's not get carried away, Potter."

"A boy can dream," He joked, before turning serious, "Thank you, Lily."

"It's what friends are for." She smiled, before rising from their positions on the floor, "I should go, it's almost time for class, but find me if you need anything, James, even if its just to talk."

James nodded and for a moment they stood suspended, unsure of what the next step should be. James, wanting to be as appropriate as possible, motioned for her to leave first. She looked up at him, a slightly puzzled look on her face, as if she had just realized something that interested her. With a smile, she hugged him carefully and he returned it eagerly. As she departed from his arms, she stood on the tips of her toes and kissed him softly on the cheek before scurrying off, paying no mind to the three boys crammed up behind the door, or the boy who's worst nightmare had just turned into his dream come true.

As Harry lingered for a few more memories of the two playing between friendship and something more for those last few weeks of their sixth year he could barely concentrate. Sure they were friendly, though truthfully it mostly consisted of their exchanging pleasantries and sitting beside each other every now and then during meals, but Harry could not think of anything more than the happiness and warmth he felt in his stomach seeing his parents kiss for the first time, even if only on the cheek.

As he exited the pensieve for a break, the warmth remained inside him, as he happily though about their future and wondered with optimism if their getting together was in front of more people so he would have a chance to see it for himself as well. The feeling, however, did not get a chance to linger much longer in his stomach as, instead, it was replaced with the rather painful sensation of being punched.

* * *

**Alrighty, we're rapidly coming towards the end here, though there may be more depending on you guys at the end. More on that when we get to it. For now, Comments? Suggestions? Review!**


	20. Chapter 20

**Thanks to everyone for reading, alerting, favoriting, and to EJam, Black4minister, janisthegiant, and Love Among the Ruins (who, I've added a line especially for right near the beginning regarding your thoughts on parental snogging, enjoy) for reviewing. Enjoy.**

* * *

Though Harry knew he was never a great thinker of his time, he gladly gave that honor to Hermione who seemed to have a pretty good handle on all things thought wise, there were quite a few thoughts going through his mind after being hit. Not the least of which was, _dear Merlin, that hurt._ Among the top contenders was the all too familiar thought regarding his wand. Just where was it? Could he reach it in time? His crumpled position begged to differ. Others included the vague anger that he could just not catch a break, even after getting rid of Voldemort he still found himself on the end of cheap shots every now and then, and the vague, still reminiscing thought that it was a bit odd for a boy to be excited about his parents snogging (if only on the cheek) and this was perhaps a future problem for therapy. Above all, however, was the most frightening thought of all. Looking up at the petite red head girl who, Harry would have to tease him later for this, hit harder than her older brother, he wondered what on earth he did to piss her off this time.

"You are the world's greatest git, Harry Potter." She proclaimed, hands at her hips.

"Er, yeah, I thought you may feel that way what with the assault and everything." He winced as he tried to stand again, and debated internally whether or not reaching for his wand for protection would just make matters worse.

"Do you even know _why_?"

"I'm sure you have your reasons..." She sighed.

"I can forgive all that bollocks about wanting to protect me and ditching me last year and not hearing a word from you all through the year, worrying all the while you've died in some ditch somewhere but this had gotten out of hand." Her vague gesture to the room. He recovered and anger began to surge.

"What do you mean, _this_?" He asked pointedly.

"This damned pensieve, obsessing over your parents-"

"Excuse me if I want to actually have memories of my parents, some of us weren't as lucky you to have _living _ones." He defensively sneered. Her face gave nothing away.

"You know that's not what I mean..."

"Then what do you mean? I should be out there jolly as can be with all the rest of the world? If you haven't noticed, it's not exactly happy-go-lucky time anywhere. Maybe I'd rather be there seeing someone happy for once."

"You've never been happy?" She asked slowly, weighing her words, "In all your time with Ron and Hermione and...me, you can't remember any happy times?" Though she was good at hiding it, he could tell she was hurt, and it frustrated him.

"You know that's not what _I_ mean."

"It can't be all sunshine and daffodils in there anyhow," Ginny changed gears, "I thought someone is sick."

"Exactly," Harry defended, "My grandfather. Just because I never had the chance to meet him doesn't mean he's not family. A family member died-"

"Fred's family."

The air from the room escaped, no matter how many times Harry tried to gasp for more in his lungs. It was the first time he could recall Ginny not flinching at her brother's name. Harry himself could not help but flinch at the name of his friend, his brother, who had died for him.

"Wh-" He could not find words.

"You are acting like there is nothing out here for you. Like this was your only family, but it isn't. We are you family. I know you think this is important, and it is, but did you ever stop to think about everyone out here waiting for you? How it feels when you'd rather be there than here?"

"I wouldn't rather be-"

"Then why have you spent every free moment there?"

"_Because_ of Fred!" He finally exclaimed, "because it hurts too much to be out here knowing everything wrong right now is my-"

"Don't say it..."

"Fault."

With his grievance out they sat in silence once again. He understood that they felt as if he was avoiding them, and it truly was not his intention to make them feel blocked from him, but he could not face the world that was now. The past was an idyllic time where, even with the threat of Voldemort looming, Harry was not pressured, he was not the Chosen One or the Boy Who Lived or the Boy Resposible For... He was just a shadow that lived without consequence.

"You really are the world's biggest git." Ginny finally spoke. Harry could not help but chuckle.

"Ginny, I'm sorry-"

"No, I am."

"It's just...relaxing there. No future ahead of me, no boring meetings at the ministry or interviews or people bothering me on the streets. It's just them. My parents. It's all I have from them."

"I know it is...not everything about being here now is bad, is it?"

"Definitely not."

"I know its not perfect, but I'm fairly certain we can make things worth you while here." She paused, the spoke again, "I'm not saying it's wrong for you to want to see how your parents were when they were living, but don't you think maybe _you_ should live a little bit too?"

Harry thought about this for a moment, realizing he had never truly thought about living for a while. It had been his whole assumption that he would not make it through this war completely safe. A future was never in the cards. Sure, there was the vague dream of being an auror, but always in the shadows lay Voldemort, wagging his finger at any idea of life beyond him. As he sat there with Ginny and thought about the future he felt himself grin. He grinned at thoughts of meeting every week for dinner at the burrow or catching offenders in thrilling chases or spending late nights with Ron, Hermione, and Ginny playing chess and talking and looked toward the pensieve between himself and Ginny. Its contents didn't seem to matter much anymore. Regardless of how his parents found each other they had found each other. They were meant to be. And for once, Harry thought maybe he was meant to be with someone too.

"Ginny?" He finally spoke up.

"Yes?"  
"I'm the world's biggest git."

"No, Harry-"

"I _am_." He insisted, "I mean, dear Merlin, even _Ron's_ gotten his act together with Hermione."

"He was your major competition there..." Ginny agreed, smiling along with Harry.

With that, Harry approached her with the same abandon he had not too long before this day and kissed her in much the same vigor as that day and their first kiss, though with some difficulty as neither could refrain from smiling long enough to properly snog.

"Luckily for you, I'm a much quicker learner." He grinned.

"Speaking of those two, how about you help me stomach watching them acting nauseatingly cute towards one another and join me for a little bit at home?" She asked.

Though she smiled, Harry saw her eyes flicker nervously to the pensieve. He knew she would not object any longer to him watching the memories inside. It would not be because she was holding her tongue, but rather she now understood why, better than anyone else. Harry took her hand in his and squeezed firmly.

"That sounds great, let's go." He replied. As he walked with Ginny towards the Burrow, he did not glance back once to the pensieve.

* * *

**Well we are rapidly approaching the end here....one more chapter in fact (I say one more chapter, but, as will be explained in that next one, things change).**

**Until then if you have any comments or suggestions, please review!**


	21. Chapter 21

**Whoo! (Tentatively) The end! As always, thank you very much to everyone who's favorited, put on alert, and of course to Black4minister, EJam, and Love among the ruins for all your reviews, you guys rock!**

**Enjoy.**

* * *

A day passed. A week. Months, years, decades and in all that time Harry did not return to the world inside the pensieve. It was not because Ginny did not like it, or his own guilt about what his friends thought each time he went inside. It was because he no longer needed it. He didn't doubt that his parents were meant to be together, or question his father's behavior, he knew that it all came with time. With time, many things came, including his own memories.

Though he never actually took the time to put anything into a pensive of his own, Harry's life had become a series of memories much like Remus had given to him so many years before. Never once did he even consider putting moments before then into a pensieve. With time he was easily washed from the memories of abuse at the Dursley's and the childhood robbed was replaced just as soon with a life he loved.

No, his pensieve would not include memories such as those, as important as they were to him, he much preferred the time after that. The time just after the war when he spent summers lazily at the Burrow with Ginny, Ron and Hermione. They wondered about the future, what jobs they would hold, whether or not they would return to school. Even the time after that, the hectic days spent apart from each other. Harry training to be an auror while Ginny and Hermione finished school and Ron, surprising them all with his motivation, both running the joke shop with George _and_training with Harry. They were rarely together, but it made moments at Hogsmeade or holidays at the Burrow all the more special.

He cherished moments like their first goodbyes, the wrenching feeling as he and Ron said goodbye to Ginny and Hermione before they departed for Hogwarts. Loved the prideful feeling he had when George finally did reopen the shop, arm draped just as proudly over a nervous Ron as he made a speech to a massive crowd. His own nervous speech given on the first anniversary of the end of the war, and the relief he felt when he locked eyes with Ginny in the crowd. The warm feeling he got each time he read one of Hermione's bill's being passed or one of Ginny's articles on Quidditch (which admittedly he read more fondly, not because it was his wife, but rather a topic he could at least _understand_).

The big moments were obvious, of course. His wedding, Ron and Hermione's. The smug satisfaction he had in watching Ron panic over his vows as Ron had done to Harry before him. The countless births of the ever expanding Weasley clan. He can remember each visit to the hospital vividly. He could swear the nurses kept a room especially for them. Each visit to platform 9 ¾ with his children, each graduation and even their own marriages and birth of their children. Those big moments, however were not as clear as the smaller moments, the ones that seemed insignificant.

For instance there were memories no one else seemed to remember but himself. Like the time Draco Malfoy approached himself, Ron and Hermione as they shopped for Hermione's school supplies. He was obviously nervous and unsure. The first to notice was Ron, and he immediately put his arm around Hermione, wand close by and motioned to the boy for Harry.

He had come to thank Harry for his assistance in the trial for him and his mother. They would never be friends, but a mutual understanding had been reached that day, and it was all thanks to Ron. The boy mumbled awkwardly to the three of them, trying in his prideful away to perhaps apologize for his actions, but was failing when Ron extended his hand to him. For the first time the two shook hands. From then on, Draco was never met with animosity, but a curt nod of the head. It was also possibly the moment Hermione fell for Ron for certain, and could see herself marrying him. Whenever Harry reminded them of the moment, she would always get a serene smile on her face and cuddle that much closer to Ron.

There were other small ones like teaching Albus to ride a broom for the first time. Though he did not tell anyone else, he felt himself tear up the first time he became airborne. He was reminded of the picture of himself riding the toy broom Sirius gave him, James no doubt laughing proudly and for a glimmer of a moment he felt like he could actually remember his father doing the same for him.

There was the time he and Ginny actually became relieved the first time they received a letter home about Lily misbehaving at school. They were beginning to get worried the girl was not there's the way she was so well behaved. He admitted that night to Ginny that his mother was the same way, straight laced but still a caring friend who could have fun. It was the first time he had talked to anyone about what he knew about his parents since the initial times he had with Ron and Hermione.

The small moments were what made up his (hypothetical) pensieve, he decided on his own years later. The ones that made him remember fondly his friends and family during the mundane. The non special days that made their bonds what they were. How Hermione would look when she just got home from work late and Harry, Ron, and Ginny were waiting to have dinner with her. How Ginny looked when she pretended she was annoyed with Harry right after he made a lame joke or suggested something outlandish. The way Ron would still secretly look at Hermione the way he had during school and he thought no one else was looking.

He would choose those moments over his final battle with Voldemort or his wedding because they were the same as Remus' pensieve. They were not pinnacle moments in the lives of Lily and James and Sirius and Remus. They were random moments, the important things Remus could remember about his friends. So were the small memories of his own. Some had more significant meaning maybe, but they were just memories of a normal life. He wouldn't have it any other way.

* * *

**Well, as I said, this is kind of the end. It was always my intention to end the story here, my reason mostly being because I wasn't looking forward to writing Lily and James as a couple, anyone as a couple and I just can't bring myself to write it. However, I had much more fun than I anticipated writing the two of them, and from what I gather in the reviews, I'm not doing a terrible job at it, either.**

**So I'm going to leave it up to you guys...**

**I can happily write a little extra part about seventh year and Harry watching. Are you interested? If so, send me a message or just leave a review. I'll decide after a week depending on how much reaction I get.**

**For now, though, this is the end. Thank you for reading.**

**Comments? Suggestions? Review!**


End file.
